Just for the one night. Then I move on to the next town and marry someone else.
And have you had many surprises with the husbands you've ended up with in the 81 marriages since you started doing the show?
Well, people are surprising. And the reason that I do a lot of audience participation, is that it makes me improvise, and I find people interesting. All the unexpected things that people say and do are nothing you could ever script, it's just sort of comedy of the moment. It wakes the audience up and it wakes me up, so I never get bored of doing it.
Do you ever get people who come to the show with the hope of getting up on stage with you?
Yes, that can happen, but I don't really pick the people who are too eager. Sometimes people point to their friend and say "pick him", but it doesn't work like that. I have to have a bit of eye contact as I go round the audience and just see who I'm instinctively drawn to.
It sounds like a game show - an area where you were quite influential in the late 80s and 90s with shows like Trick or Treat and Sticky Moments.
Yes, a game show is exactly what it is, and I think it worked back then, and works now, because they're ripe for being parodied. They're perfect to send up, while you still make them work in a competitive sense.
Is this one of your favourite shows that you've done?
It is, it's certainly been the most successful one for me in recent years. I was always scared of the idea of having this many people on stage, but actually people are surprisingly well-behaved, and it's interesting how people behave when there's a whole group of them up there, instead of just one or two. They start to behave collectively and they're braver, they egg each other on and it's almost like there's a support group up there.
Do they ever gang up on you?
Oh no, I'm far too charming for that.
Do you see patterns in the behaviour of the people who come up on stage?
Yes I do, because people are fairly easily manipulated. I know what I want them to do, so say I want them to drop their trousers, I know they'll say no initially, but with a few certain encouraging words I can change that. I had a lawyer on stage the other day, who wasn't the sort to drop his trousers in public, and he was adamant that it wasn't going to happen, but once they hear the potential of the applause in the audience - and generally people want to please, don't they - he was charmed, and with the right words, down the trousers came.
Hearing applause or laughter from an audience is a very addictive thing, it's very powerful, and it's the contestants who are getting the laughs, so they get a taste of what it's like, which I think they like. And it's something to talk about at a dinner party, isn't it?
You've been doing this for an impressive three decades now: how have things changed?
People are less conservative, less threatened and, I guess because I've been around for a while now, people know what they're buying a ticket to see, it's not like it was when I first started out.
The whole gay angle is slightly irrelevant now as well, it's not a big deal for people, and so there's less outrage to be caused, or to be elicited, but I suppose as I get older I'm not as interested in outraging people either. It's more about giving people a good time.
Do you have to be more provocative now to make people laugh?
Well, people are expecting some provocation, they're expecting a bit of filth, they're expecting a certain amount of danger, but I suppose if we knew what makes people laugh, then life would be different.
It's hard to analyse, even for a comedian.
You always seem to have many things on the go at once, appearing on TV and doing various projects, what's next?
I'm quite busy this year actually. I'm doing a TV series when I get back to England, which I'm really looking forward to. It's a nature series, rather than straightforward comedy. I think I've got to go swimming with seals, and hang-gliding with eagles and things like that. I guess that's my other life, I'm interested in animals and wildlife and all of that carry-on, so it's nice to do something contrasting. And then I'm writing a children's book when I go back as well, so that will see me through the next few months.
You've done a fair bit of reality TV lately, with Celebrity Big Brother and Strictly Come Dancing, is there anything you wouldn't do?
I don't think I'd do that series in the jungle, the Survivor-type thing. I think I've made my contribution to reality television, really, but unexpected things come along sometimes, so you just have to wait and see what is offered.
Who: Julian Clary
What: Position Vacant: Apply Within
When and where: Sunday night, SkyCity Theatre
- TimeOut
