Twelve Questions with Urzila Carlson

Urzila Carlson is a big Oprah fan. Photo / Supplied

She has been described as 'adorable, smart and bent'. She is also very funny. Carlson is a South African-born New Zealander who came to comedy in 2008. She is a regular guest on TV3's 7 Days. Her show, I'm Going to Need a Second Opinion, features as part of the Comedy Festival, from April 28.

What makes you funny?

I'm from a long line of funny.

Funny as in ha-ha and funny as in oh-oh.

What's the hardest thing about being a female comedian?

There's no difference to me. It's like saying 'what's it like being a female pilot?' The procedures are all the same, including the landing. I don't do flips and s*** at the end.

Hecklers - how do you handle them?

I don't get hecklers and it really bums me out. But it's probably for the best. I'm sure I'll go too violent ... because how many times are you allowed to hit them?

What moves you to tears?

The national anthem. Watching someone excel in his or her field. I had a little tear when Richie McCaw got his cap for the 100th game.

What kind of joke would you never stoop to tell?

Rape.

If you could meet John Key, what would you like to say to him?

Talk less, listen more and never ever mince in public again, it looks too believable.

What person, famous or infamous, would you like to entertain?

Oprah Winfrey because she's Oprah! If I could get her and Nelson Mandela together, my head would explode with excitement.

When/where do you get your funniest ideas - night, day, walking, sleeping?

In the shower.

Describe your idea of culinary nirvana?

Falling into a vat of chocolate then crawling out and chasing it with a couple of dozen mini pies and to top it off, a good coffee.

What is your Achilles' heel?

Coffee. I would trade almost anything for a really good coffee.

What music can you simply not sit down to?

Miley Cyrus, I just have to jump up and change the radio station! I'm really into Adam Lambert at the moment. I dance around like a teenager when some of his songs come on.

What is your greatest retail folly?

I am a little obsessed with pedicures at the moment.