TV Eye: Telly not to be sneezed at

<i>Accidentally On Purpose</i> (C4, Tuesdays 8.30pm). Photo / Supplied

Thanks, Survivors.

I'm now hexing anyone who sneezes or wheezes in my breathing zone after watching the movie-length (and way too long) debut of the BBC drama series (Prime, Thursday).

A remake of the 1970s "classic", Survivors ca. 2010 started out in London as a "European Flu" epidemic broke out, accompanied by histrionic Spooks-style music and microscopic images of viral beasties gobbling human cells.

The hero of the hour (or two hours) came in the unlikely form of suburban mum Abby (Julie Graham), fretting for her son, away in Wales at an outdoor activities centre. Little did she know she'd soon have much more to worry about - cue, footage of her sitting on a train surrounded by fruity coughing. She got the flu, as did 90 per cent of the global population.

The difference between Abby and them is that she recovered and woke up three days later, only to discover her husband was dead, the fridge stank and she was alone in a suburb full of corpses.

The hospitals were crammed full of bodies, the Prime Minister died, the Government collapsed. Inexplicably, while all this was going on, some people still went out and partied.

A wealthy young Kuwaiti man called Al woke up in his luxury apartment to find the girl he'd picked up the night before was dead. With the power and water off, Al displayed excellent survival instincts and devoured the contents of his fridge - caviar and champers - before racing off in his flash car.

He almost ran over 11-year-old Najid, sole survivor of a flu wipeout at a mosque. They became reluctant allies: Al thought Najid was a nuisance; Najid thought Al was a berk. By now this serial/circular introduction of characters was becoming a rather obvious device to introduce the "survivors".

Demographically, there must be a villain. Cue Tom (Max Beesley), a prisoner serving 20 years for a nameless crime. By the time he escaped (by killing the only surviving warden), and hooked up with a young couple, it seemed possible Tom might be a sex offender, judging by the way he came on to her. They threw him out of the car.

So here were the core group of "survivors" driving aimlessly around the British countryside - and then they came together on an empty motorway and stared into an entirely new future without technology, electricity or rules of civilisation.

The dialogue was often unfortunate. An instructor at the outdoor centre in Wales made a speech: "We've become helpless babies", pointing out the need to get back to basics as Abby prodded at her dying cellphone. When she met Najid and co, she too speechified: "Every new person feels like a gift", before persuading them all to work communally with her as "leader".

I don't think Tom does communal - but whether that's going to help me stick with Survivors remains to be seen.

I used to quite like Jenna Elfman when she was a ditzy goofball in Dharma & Greg a million years ago. She is still a ditzy goofball in Accidentally On Purpose (C4, Tuesday), playing a 37-year-old film critic (oh, really?) who has dumped her commitment phobic boyfriend-boss.

She quickly picked up a dumb young slacker at a party, got pregnant, he moved in, his slacker mates hung around, her boyfriend wanted her back etc. It's a mish-mash of silly dialogue, canned laughter and implausible characters. In its time, Dharma was a breath of fresh air; this one stinks.

-TimeOut