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Home / Entertainment

Steve Braunias: Secret Diary of The Bachelor

Steve Braunias
By Steve Braunias
Senior Writer·NZ Herald·
13 May, 2016 05:00 PM4 mins to read

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Words can't express my feelings for wassername. Photo / Supplied

Words can't express my feelings for wassername. Photo / Supplied

Steve Braunias
Opinion by Steve Braunias
Steve Braunias writes for the Listener and Newsroom.
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MONDAY

Fleur Verhoeven: I'm really looking forward to seeing Jordan again. It's been a while since filming stopped, seven weeks actually.

I just want to spend some time with him, you know, talk like normal people with no cameras around.

I'm not thinking about marriage right now. I just want to hang out with him.

I'm really excited, it's been tough. We've been trying to call each other daily, texting, it's been tough. Because you want to get to know each other and you can't really hang out in person.

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I'm glad that it's over, I can finally talk and be open about it. I'm in the Hawkes Bay, where I've been staying with my parents for a couple of months. I'd originally planned to move to Wellington, but do you know what, let's move to Auckland! I don't have anything holding me back.

Yeah, it'll be so nice to sit down and have a coffee, face to face.

Jordan Mauger: Words can't express my feelings for wassername.

TUESDAY

Jordan: Deciding who to choose was about going back right to the very beginning. I'd made a notebook, about everything that had happened, moments that I'd had, with each of the girls.

It was quite interesting, going back and following the journey I'd had with both girls from the very beginning.

I was fine-tooth combing it, again and again and again.

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Looking back, the first moment that I had with Fleur, was going swimming after the volleyball. I turned around and she was the only girl there and all of the other girls had gone ashore.

I think I knew then that she was the one for me, or maybe I didn't and come to think of it I still don't know.

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Fleur: I've been sitting here waiting for him but his coffee's gone cold.

WEDNESDAY

Naz Khanjani: One day I'll meet the man of my dreams. It could happen any minute. He might be the very next man I'll meet.

Thane Kirby: You're listening to George FM and my next guests are Naz Khanjani and her knockers.

Jordan: At the end of the day, I suppose I'd better get it over with. I think I'll wait till the end of the day.

Fleur: I was in a furniture store this morning and everything reminded me of Jordan. I said to the assistant, "It must be love!" He said, "Were you looking for anything in particular? Everything here is made of a very smooth and very dense wood."

Naz: There was a strange smell when I walked into the studio.

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Thane: Welcome to the show! It's great to see both of you. You're both looking fantastic. I can't take my eyes off either one of you. Oh and hi to you as well, Naz, you look nice.

Jordan: We sat down and I told her that I had feelings for her.

Fleur: I told him that I had feelings for him, too.

Jordan: I told her that unfortunately the feelings I had for her were more along the lines of not having any feelings.

Fleur: I wished him all the best.

Jordan: I told her that she'd always have my full support.

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Fleur: We shook hands.

Jordan: It was quite romantic.

Naz: I washed my hands with 18 different kinds of soap, including an industrial detergent, but I couldn't get rid of that rank, odious smell.

THURSDAY

Jordan: The difference between reality TV and reality is unreal.

Naz: I slept with Jordan. More than once!

Fleur: I was having a difficult morning, so I texted Jordan to ask for his support but he didn't get back to me.

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Jordan: My agent said the phone would be ringing off the hook with acting offers. I said, "Really?" He said, "Really."

Naz: I never slept with him. Are you kidding?

FRIDAY

Jordan: No one phoned. I called my agent, and he said, "Sorry, who is this?"

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