Siena Yates: Kevin Spacey is deflecting and we can't let him

Kevin Spacey, who starred in House of Cards, has been accused by five men of sexual harassment. Photo / Supplied

When I was a kid I lied a lot. I was especially good at lying my way out of trouble because it was never really a lie - that was the trick.

You told a bit of truth with a bit of lie and a tonne of deflection.

Example: "I really don't want to run the race, but I'll give it the ol' college try" and then you conveniently hurt your ankle as you approach the start line. Not enough that you will be in too much pain to go on the school trip the next day, but enough that you have to limp around wincing for the rest of the athletics day.

But I digress.

The point is: It's a tried and true strategy. Why else do you think Kevin Spacey did it?

If you somehow managed to miss it, Kevin Spacey has come under fire this week as around five different men (thus far) have accused him of sexual harassment.

The first accuser was Anthony Rapp, who alleges Spacey made sexual advances when he was just 14 - Spacey would've been 26 at the time. Others include actor Roberto Cavazos and filmmaker Tony Montana.

But it's Spacey's response to Rapp's initial allegations which have caused even more upset.

pic.twitter.com/X6ybi5atr5

— Kevin Spacey (@KevinSpacey) October 30, 2017

Spacey said he didn't remember the alleged encounter, but said "if I did behave then as he describes, I owe him the sincerest apology".

A bit of truth mixed with a bit of an excuse.

He then added: "As those closest to me know, in my life I have had relationships with both men and women. I have loved and had romantic encounters with men throughout my life, and I choose now to live as a gay man."

And we're straight into the deflection, in which Spacey chose this moment to come out as gay as if it a) is some kind of excuse for acting in a predatory nature, or b) could shield him from the backlash.

And the problem with it is that despite it being such an obvious deflection, it's also one which is so harmful it's hard to ignore, and that's how Spacey succeeded in changing the conversation.

Led by the likes of Zachary Quinto and Wanda Sykes, queer Hollywood quickly told Spacey to quit "hiding under the rainbow", because the problem with that is it makes everyone who had doubts about us as a community, more wary.

pic.twitter.com/pg2PLnHpXt

— Zachary Quinto (@ZacharyQuinto) October 30, 2017

No no no no no! You do not get to “choose” to hide under the rainbow! Kick rocks! https://t.co/xJDGAxDjxz

— Wanda Sykes (@iamwandasykes) October 30, 2017

It perpetuates this idea that he did these things because he was gay. And on another level, the idea that he did these things because he repressed his homosexuality, and it got away from him under the influence.

It's the same as when various news outlets around the world reported on Amber Heard's break-up with Johnny Depp by headlining her bisexuality - because, 'of course this marriage disintegrated, you can't trust the greedy bisexuals'.

But like actress Evan Rachel Wood said about Spacey: "I am bi, have been to parties with minors while intoxicated and I have never assaulted anyone because being bi doesn't make you a predator."

It's as easy as that. Or it should be. But we're still trying to overcome a history which has painted homosexuality as a perversion, crime, sin and/or mental illness.

Yet here's Kevin Spacey, throwing us back under the bus to save himself. It's nothing but a distraction tactic and anyone whose ever lied their way out of a cross-country run knows it.

The bigger problem isn't that Spacey did it, it's that too many people fell for it. He threw out the decoy and we all leapt on it, focusing on it and its fallout rather than the fact that Spacey had just joined an ever-growing list of accused which includes Harvey Weinstein, Ben Affleck, James Toback, Brett Ratner and more.

But loathe as we all may be to admit it, there's not a lot we can do about these situations short of posting condemning tweets and think-pieces. We could boycott their films and shows but those pay cheques have long been cashed in, and besides, they're not the only ones who lose in that equation.

What we can do is take these examples and learn from them.

pic.twitter.com/vkw4jyR7Hx

— Krista Vernoff (@KristaVernoff) October 30, 2017

We can teach people that Spacey is an extraordinary case and his actions do not represent the rest of the LGBT community, just like no man wants to be lumped in with Weinstein.

But to do that, we have to get past the distractions. There's been too much focus on Kevin Spacey's sexuality and stardom.

This isn't a Hollywood star who came out amidst allegations. This is a man who is accused of sexual harassment involving minors who also happens to be gay and work in front of a camera.

Just like Weinstein is a merely man who abused his power and Donald Trump is a man who thought his wealth and status gave him the right to "grab 'em by the p**sy".

We need to stop burying these people's actions in accolades, status and deflections and keep focus where it needs to be.