NZ Herald
  • Home
  • Latest news
  • Herald NOW
  • Video
  • New Zealand
  • Sport
  • World
  • Business
  • Entertainment
  • Podcasts
  • Quizzes
  • Opinion
  • Lifestyle
  • Travel
  • Viva
  • Weather

Subscriptions

  • Herald Premium
  • Viva Premium
  • The Listener
  • BusinessDesk

Sections

  • Latest news
  • New Zealand
    • All New Zealand
    • Crime
    • Politics
    • Education
    • Open Justice
    • Scam Update
  • Herald NOW
  • On The Up
  • World
    • All World
    • Australia
    • Asia
    • UK
    • United States
    • Middle East
    • Europe
    • Pacific
  • Business
    • All Business
    • MarketsSharesCurrencyCommoditiesStock TakesCrypto
    • Markets with Madison
    • Media Insider
    • Business analysis
    • Personal financeKiwiSaverInterest ratesTaxInvestment
    • EconomyInflationGDPOfficial cash rateEmployment
    • Small business
    • Business reportsMood of the BoardroomProject AucklandSustainable business and financeCapital markets reportAgribusiness reportInfrastructure reportDynamic business
    • Deloitte Top 200 Awards
    • Deloitte Fast 50
    • CompaniesAged CareAgribusinessAirlinesBanking and financeConstructionEnergyFreight and logisticsHealthcareManufacturingMedia and MarketingRetailTelecommunicationsTourism
  • Opinion
    • All Opinion
    • Analysis
    • Editorials
    • Business analysis
    • Premium opinion
    • Letters to the editor
  • Politics
  • Sport
    • All Sport
    • OlympicsParalympics
    • RugbySuper RugbyNPCAll BlacksBlack FernsRugby sevensSchool rugby
    • CricketBlack CapsWhite Ferns
    • Racing
    • NetballSilver Ferns
    • LeagueWarriorsNRL
    • FootballWellington PhoenixAuckland FCAll WhitesFootball FernsEnglish Premier League
    • GolfNZ Open
    • MotorsportFormula 1
    • Boxing
    • UFC
    • BasketballNBABreakersTall BlacksTall Ferns
    • Tennis
    • Cycling
    • Athletics
    • SailingAmerica's CupSailGP
    • Rowing
  • Lifestyle
    • All Lifestyle
    • Viva - Food, fashion & beauty
    • Society Insider
    • Royals
    • Sex & relationships
    • Food & drinkRecipesRecipe collectionsRestaurant reviewsRestaurant bookings
    • Health & wellbeing
    • Fashion & beauty
    • Pets & animals
    • The Selection - Shop the trendsShop fashionShop beautyShop entertainmentShop giftsShop home & living
    • Milford's Investing Place
  • Entertainment
    • All Entertainment
    • TV
    • MoviesMovie reviews
    • MusicMusic reviews
    • BooksBook reviews
    • Culture
    • ReviewsBook reviewsMovie reviewsMusic reviewsRestaurant reviews
  • Travel
    • All Travel
    • News
    • New ZealandNorthlandAucklandWellingtonCanterburyOtago / QueenstownNelson-TasmanBest NZ beaches
    • International travelAustraliaPacific IslandsEuropeUKUSAAfricaAsia
    • Rail holidays
    • Cruise holidays
    • Ski holidays
    • Luxury travel
    • Adventure travel
  • Kāhu Māori news
  • Environment
    • All Environment
    • Our Green Future
  • Talanoa Pacific news
  • Property
    • All Property
    • Property Insider
    • Interest rates tracker
    • Residential property listings
    • Commercial property listings
  • Health
  • Technology
    • All Technology
    • AI
    • Social media
  • Rural
    • All Rural
    • Dairy farming
    • Sheep & beef farming
    • Horticulture
    • Animal health
    • Rural business
    • Rural life
    • Rural technology
    • Opinion
    • Audio & podcasts
  • Weather forecasts
    • All Weather forecasts
    • Kaitaia
    • Whangārei
    • Dargaville
    • Auckland
    • Thames
    • Tauranga
    • Hamilton
    • Whakatāne
    • Rotorua
    • Tokoroa
    • Te Kuiti
    • Taumaranui
    • Taupō
    • Gisborne
    • New Plymouth
    • Napier
    • Hastings
    • Dannevirke
    • Whanganui
    • Palmerston North
    • Levin
    • Paraparaumu
    • Masterton
    • Wellington
    • Motueka
    • Nelson
    • Blenheim
    • Westport
    • Reefton
    • Kaikōura
    • Greymouth
    • Hokitika
    • Christchurch
    • Ashburton
    • Timaru
    • Wānaka
    • Oamaru
    • Queenstown
    • Dunedin
    • Gore
    • Invercargill
  • Meet the journalists
  • Promotions & competitions
  • OneRoof property listings
  • Driven car news

Puzzles & Quizzes

  • Puzzles
    • All Puzzles
    • Sudoku
    • Code Cracker
    • Crosswords
    • Cryptic crossword
    • Wordsearch
  • Quizzes
    • All Quizzes
    • Morning quiz
    • Afternoon quiz
    • Sports quiz

Regions

  • Northland
    • All Northland
    • Far North
    • Kaitaia
    • Kerikeri
    • Kaikohe
    • Bay of Islands
    • Whangarei
    • Dargaville
    • Kaipara
    • Mangawhai
  • Auckland
  • Waikato
    • All Waikato
    • Hamilton
    • Coromandel & Hauraki
    • Matamata & Piako
    • Cambridge
    • Te Awamutu
    • Tokoroa & South Waikato
    • Taupō & Tūrangi
  • Bay of Plenty
    • All Bay of Plenty
    • Katikati
    • Tauranga
    • Mount Maunganui
    • Pāpāmoa
    • Te Puke
    • Whakatāne
  • Rotorua
  • Hawke's Bay
    • All Hawke's Bay
    • Napier
    • Hastings
    • Havelock North
    • Central Hawke's Bay
    • Wairoa
  • Taranaki
    • All Taranaki
    • Stratford
    • New Plymouth
    • Hāwera
  • Manawatū - Whanganui
    • All Manawatū - Whanganui
    • Whanganui
    • Palmerston North
    • Manawatū
    • Tararua
    • Horowhenua
  • Wellington
    • All Wellington
    • Kapiti
    • Wairarapa
    • Upper Hutt
    • Lower Hutt
  • Nelson & Tasman
    • All Nelson & Tasman
    • Motueka
    • Nelson
    • Tasman
  • Marlborough
  • West Coast
  • Canterbury
    • All Canterbury
    • Kaikōura
    • Christchurch
    • Ashburton
    • Timaru
  • Otago
    • All Otago
    • Oamaru
    • Dunedin
    • Balclutha
    • Alexandra
    • Queenstown
    • Wanaka
  • Southland
    • All Southland
    • Invercargill
    • Gore
    • Stewart Island
  • Gisborne

Media

  • Video
    • All Video
    • NZ news video
    • Herald NOW
    • Business news video
    • Politics news video
    • Sport video
    • World news video
    • Lifestyle video
    • Entertainment video
    • Travel video
    • Markets with Madison
    • Kea Kids news
  • Podcasts
    • All Podcasts
    • The Front Page
    • On the Tiles
    • Ask me Anything
    • The Little Things
  • Cartoons
  • Photo galleries
  • Today's Paper - E-editions
  • Photo sales
  • Classifieds

NZME Network

  • Advertise with NZME
  • OneRoof
  • Driven Car Guide
  • BusinessDesk
  • Newstalk ZB
  • Sunlive
  • ZM
  • The Hits
  • Coast
  • Radio Hauraki
  • The Alternative Commentary Collective
  • Gold
  • Flava
  • iHeart Radio
  • Hokonui
  • Radio Wanaka
  • iHeartCountry New Zealand
  • Restaurant Hub
  • NZME Events

SubscribeSign In

Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.
Home / Entertainment

Sideswipe: November 15: Magical hands

Ana Samways
By Ana Samways
Sideswipe - ana.samways@nzherald.co.nz·NZ Herald·
14 Nov, 2016 04:00 PM3 mins to read

Subscribe to listen

Access to Herald Premium articles require a Premium subscription. Subscribe now to listen.
Already a subscriber?  

Listening to articles is free for open-access content—explore other articles or learn more about text-to-speech.
‌
Save
    Share this article
The sign said 'Have we seen your cat lately' - until some comedic genius got their hands on it.
The sign said 'Have we seen your cat lately' - until some comedic genius got their hands on it.

The sign said 'Have we seen your cat lately' - until some comedic genius got their hands on it.

Ana Samways
Opinion by Ana SamwaysLearn more

Health and safety overlooks the small stuff

"Working for a government organisation, we have health and safety induction courses," writes a reader. "We are told of the escape routes from our building, where the fire extinguishers are located and we have regular fire drills. There are warning signs on the jug saying 'caution water may be hot', signs on the microwave telling us to use microwave-safe utensils because not doing so may 'result in the containers being hotter than usual'. The building has two defibrillators. But I have just cut my finger and there are no band aids in the First Aid kit."

Far-right gets nasty

The conversation around the US election has popularised some new words, some of which have made it on to the Oxford Dictionary radar, like 'cuckservative', a noun: "Among supporters of the alt-right, the neologism cuckservative is used as an insult for mainstream conservatives. The source of -servative in this portmanteau is obvious, but where does cuck" come from? It is shortened from the word cuckold, a derisive term for a man whose wife is unfaithful which arose in English in the 13th century and is relatively uncommon in modern use. As a modern insult, cuck conveys a metaphor of emasculation, but its forcefulness is also enhanced by the fact that it resembles no fewer than three taboo four-letter words in English, and thus carries a strong whiff of obscenity." (Source: blog.oxforddictionaries.com)

Act of kindness

Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.
Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.

"Imagine being hospitalised with your 9-week-old baby," writes Ruchika Nayyar from Canberra on Quora. "Finally, you're discharged after a few days. You walk towards your car, exhausted by the strain. As you get closer you notice a parking ticket. Your heart sinks as you reach out to open it. Inside the envelope is a note that reads, "Hi there, I saw your car had a parking ticket on it. I'm sure whatever you're going through at hospital is tough enough, so I have paid this for you." With receipt attached.

Staff at Whitcoulls Whangarei clearly don't understand satire.
Staff at Whitcoulls Whangarei clearly don't understand satire.

Note to council

A reader writes: "The cynic in me says the staff at Auckland Council must spend their time reading Sideswipe, because after your piece pointing out that the T3 enforcement officer always stands in the same place on Remuera Rd, he set up in a new location this morning for the first time in years! He didn't look very happy, but here's hoping his increased returns will bolster his mood. Now how about these missing sun shades at Madills Farm Reserve playground . . . "

Video: An animated timeline map of human population growth from the American Museum of Natural History show that the only significant decline in human population was during the bubonic plague...

Herald app users tap here for today's video.

Got a Sideswipe? Send your pictures, links and anecdotes to Ana at ana.samways@nzherald.co.nz

Discover more

Opinion

Sideswipe: Bylaw ignored

08 Nov 04:00 PM
Opinion

Sideswipe: Keeping you informed

09 Nov 04:30 PM
Opinion

Sideswipe: Appliance down!

10 Nov 04:30 PM
Opinion

Sideswipe: Suspicious cart

13 Nov 04:00 PM
Save
    Share this article

Latest from Entertainment

Entertainment

First Kiwi to make Dallas Cowboys cheerleading team responds to ponytail backlash

Entertainment

The 10 most career-defining, headline-grabbing moments of rocker Ozzy Osbourne

Entertainment

Julia Roberts, Jude Law to feature at star-packed Venice Film Festival


Sponsored

Sponsored: 50 shades of beige

Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.

Recommended for you

How Northland plans to transform into a $60b economic powerhouse
Northern Advocate

How Northland plans to transform into a $60b economic powerhouse

Quad bikes focus after fatal farm incidents
The Country

Quad bikes focus after fatal farm incidents

Rugby legend returns to old stomping ground for Classics match
Whanganui Chronicle

Rugby legend returns to old stomping ground for Classics match

Uber Eats and UK govt join up against illegally working migrants
World

Uber Eats and UK govt join up against illegally working migrants

Has the rental market flatlined? Median rental prices down, 'affordability ceiling' curbing rises
Business

Has the rental market flatlined? Median rental prices down, 'affordability ceiling' curbing rises

‘We hit rock bottom’: How unhealthy relationship with food started a global brand
Business

‘We hit rock bottom’: How unhealthy relationship with food started a global brand



Latest from Entertainment

First Kiwi to make Dallas Cowboys cheerleading team responds to ponytail backlash
Entertainment

First Kiwi to make Dallas Cowboys cheerleading team responds to ponytail backlash

Faith Ward's ponytail has sparked online debate because of the team's strict hair rules.

23 Jul 08:23 AM
The 10 most career-defining, headline-grabbing moments of rocker Ozzy Osbourne
Entertainment

The 10 most career-defining, headline-grabbing moments of rocker Ozzy Osbourne

23 Jul 08:09 AM
Julia Roberts, Jude Law to feature at star-packed Venice Film Festival
Entertainment

Julia Roberts, Jude Law to feature at star-packed Venice Film Festival

23 Jul 02:27 AM


Sponsored: 50 shades of beige
Sponsored

Sponsored: 50 shades of beige

21 Jul 07:08 AM

NZ Herald
  • About NZ Herald
  • Meet the journalists
  • Newsletters
  • Classifieds
  • Help & support
  • Contact us
  • House rules
  • Privacy Policy
  • Terms of use
  • Competition terms & conditions
  • Our use of AI
Subscriber Services
  • NZ Herald e-editions
  • Daily puzzles & quizzes
  • Manage your digital subscription
  • Manage your print subscription
  • Subscribe to the NZ Herald newspaper
  • Subscribe to Herald Premium
  • Gift a subscription
  • Subscriber FAQs
  • Subscription terms & conditions
  • Promotions and subscriber benefits
NZME Network
  • The New Zealand Herald
  • The Northland Age
  • The Northern Advocate
  • Waikato Herald
  • Bay of Plenty Times
  • Rotorua Daily Post
  • Hawke's Bay Today
  • Whanganui Chronicle
  • Viva
  • NZ Listener
  • Newstalk ZB
  • BusinessDesk
  • OneRoof
  • Driven Car Guide
  • iHeart Radio
  • Restaurant Hub
NZME
  • About NZME
  • NZME careers
  • Advertise with NZME
  • Digital self-service advertising
  • Book your classified ad
  • Photo sales
  • NZME Events
  • © Copyright 2025 NZME Publishing Limited
All Access. All in one subscription. From $2 per week
Subscribe now

All Access Weekly

From $2 per week
Pay just
$15.75
$2
per week ongoing
Subscribe now
BEST VALUE

All Access Annual

Pay just
$449
$49
per year ongoing
Subscribe now
Learn more
30
TOP
search by queryly Advanced Search