NZ Herald
  • Home
  • Latest news
  • Herald NOW
  • Video
  • New Zealand
  • Sport
  • World
  • Business
  • Entertainment
  • Podcasts
  • Quizzes
  • Opinion
  • Lifestyle
  • Travel
  • Viva
  • Weather

Subscriptions

  • Herald Premium
  • Viva Premium
  • The Listener
  • BusinessDesk

Sections

  • Latest news
  • New Zealand
    • All New Zealand
    • Crime
    • Politics
    • Education
    • Open Justice
    • Scam Update
  • Herald NOW
  • On The Up
  • World
    • All World
    • Australia
    • Asia
    • UK
    • United States
    • Middle East
    • Europe
    • Pacific
  • Business
    • All Business
    • MarketsSharesCurrencyCommoditiesStock TakesCrypto
    • Markets with Madison
    • Media Insider
    • Business analysis
    • Personal financeKiwiSaverInterest ratesTaxInvestment
    • EconomyInflationGDPOfficial cash rateEmployment
    • Small business
    • Business reportsMood of the BoardroomProject AucklandSustainable business and financeCapital markets reportAgribusiness reportInfrastructure reportDynamic business
    • Deloitte Top 200 Awards
    • CompaniesAged CareAgribusinessAirlinesBanking and financeConstructionEnergyFreight and logisticsHealthcareManufacturingMedia and MarketingRetailTelecommunicationsTourism
  • Opinion
    • All Opinion
    • Analysis
    • Editorials
    • Business analysis
    • Premium opinion
    • Letters to the editor
  • Politics
  • Sport
    • All Sport
    • OlympicsParalympics
    • RugbySuper RugbyNPCAll BlacksBlack FernsRugby sevensSchool rugby
    • CricketBlack CapsWhite Ferns
    • Racing
    • NetballSilver Ferns
    • LeagueWarriorsNRL
    • FootballWellington PhoenixAuckland FCAll WhitesFootball FernsEnglish Premier League
    • GolfNZ Open
    • MotorsportFormula 1
    • Boxing
    • UFC
    • BasketballNBABreakersTall BlacksTall Ferns
    • Tennis
    • Cycling
    • Athletics
    • SailingAmerica's CupSailGP
    • Rowing
  • Lifestyle
    • All Lifestyle
    • Viva - Food, fashion & beauty
    • Society Insider
    • Royals
    • Sex & relationships
    • Food & drinkRecipesRecipe collectionsRestaurant reviewsRestaurant bookings
    • Health & wellbeing
    • Fashion & beauty
    • Pets & animals
    • The Selection - Shop the trendsShop fashionShop beautyShop entertainmentShop giftsShop home & living
    • Milford's Investing Place
  • Entertainment
    • All Entertainment
    • TV
    • MoviesMovie reviews
    • MusicMusic reviews
    • BooksBook reviews
    • Culture
    • ReviewsBook reviewsMovie reviewsMusic reviewsRestaurant reviews
  • Travel
    • All Travel
    • News
    • New ZealandNorthlandAucklandWellingtonCanterburyOtago / QueenstownNelson-TasmanBest NZ beaches
    • International travelAustraliaPacific IslandsEuropeUKUSAAfricaAsia
    • Rail holidays
    • Cruise holidays
    • Ski holidays
    • Luxury travel
    • Adventure travel
  • Kāhu Māori news
  • Environment
    • All Environment
    • Our Green Future
  • Talanoa Pacific news
  • Property
    • All Property
    • Property Insider
    • Interest rates tracker
    • Residential property listings
    • Commercial property listings
  • Health
  • Technology
    • All Technology
    • AI
    • Social media
  • Rural
    • All Rural
    • Dairy farming
    • Sheep & beef farming
    • Horticulture
    • Animal health
    • Rural business
    • Rural life
    • Rural technology
    • Opinion
    • Audio & podcasts
  • Weather forecasts
    • All Weather forecasts
    • Kaitaia
    • Whangārei
    • Dargaville
    • Auckland
    • Thames
    • Tauranga
    • Hamilton
    • Whakatāne
    • Rotorua
    • Tokoroa
    • Te Kuiti
    • Taumaranui
    • Taupō
    • Gisborne
    • New Plymouth
    • Napier
    • Hastings
    • Dannevirke
    • Whanganui
    • Palmerston North
    • Levin
    • Paraparaumu
    • Masterton
    • Wellington
    • Motueka
    • Nelson
    • Blenheim
    • Westport
    • Reefton
    • Kaikōura
    • Greymouth
    • Hokitika
    • Christchurch
    • Ashburton
    • Timaru
    • Wānaka
    • Oamaru
    • Queenstown
    • Dunedin
    • Gore
    • Invercargill
  • Meet the journalists
  • Promotions & competitions
  • OneRoof property listings
  • Driven car news

Puzzles & Quizzes

  • Puzzles
    • All Puzzles
    • Sudoku
    • Code Cracker
    • Crosswords
    • Cryptic crossword
    • Wordsearch
  • Quizzes
    • All Quizzes
    • Morning quiz
    • Afternoon quiz
    • Sports quiz

Regions

  • Northland
    • All Northland
    • Far North
    • Kaitaia
    • Kerikeri
    • Kaikohe
    • Bay of Islands
    • Whangarei
    • Dargaville
    • Kaipara
    • Mangawhai
  • Auckland
  • Waikato
    • All Waikato
    • Hamilton
    • Coromandel & Hauraki
    • Matamata & Piako
    • Cambridge
    • Te Awamutu
    • Tokoroa & South Waikato
    • Taupō & Tūrangi
  • Bay of Plenty
    • All Bay of Plenty
    • Katikati
    • Tauranga
    • Mount Maunganui
    • Pāpāmoa
    • Te Puke
    • Whakatāne
  • Rotorua
  • Hawke's Bay
    • All Hawke's Bay
    • Napier
    • Hastings
    • Havelock North
    • Central Hawke's Bay
    • Wairoa
  • Taranaki
    • All Taranaki
    • Stratford
    • New Plymouth
    • Hāwera
  • Manawatū - Whanganui
    • All Manawatū - Whanganui
    • Whanganui
    • Palmerston North
    • Manawatū
    • Tararua
    • Horowhenua
  • Wellington
    • All Wellington
    • Kapiti
    • Wairarapa
    • Upper Hutt
    • Lower Hutt
  • Nelson & Tasman
    • All Nelson & Tasman
    • Motueka
    • Nelson
    • Tasman
  • Marlborough
  • West Coast
  • Canterbury
    • All Canterbury
    • Kaikōura
    • Christchurch
    • Ashburton
    • Timaru
  • Otago
    • All Otago
    • Oamaru
    • Dunedin
    • Balclutha
    • Alexandra
    • Queenstown
    • Wanaka
  • Southland
    • All Southland
    • Invercargill
    • Gore
    • Stewart Island
  • Gisborne

Media

  • Video
    • All Video
    • NZ news video
    • Herald NOW
    • Business news video
    • Politics news video
    • Sport video
    • World news video
    • Lifestyle video
    • Entertainment video
    • Travel video
    • Markets with Madison
    • Kea Kids news
  • Podcasts
    • All Podcasts
    • The Front Page
    • On the Tiles
    • Ask me Anything
    • The Little Things
  • Cartoons
  • Photo galleries
  • Today's Paper - E-editions
  • Photo sales
  • Classifieds

NZME Network

  • Advertise with NZME
  • OneRoof
  • Driven Car Guide
  • BusinessDesk
  • Newstalk ZB
  • Sunlive
  • ZM
  • The Hits
  • Coast
  • Radio Hauraki
  • The Alternative Commentary Collective
  • Gold
  • Flava
  • iHeart Radio
  • Hokonui
  • Radio Wanaka
  • iHeartCountry New Zealand
  • Restaurant Hub
  • NZME Events

SubscribeSign In
Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.
Home / Entertainment

Sideswipe: Nov 8: Egg bed

Ana Samways
By Ana Samways
Sideswipe - ana.samways@nzherald.co.nz·NZ Herald·
7 Nov, 2017 04:00 PM3 mins to read

Subscribe to listen

Access to Herald Premium articles require a Premium subscription. Subscribe now to listen.
Already a subscriber?  Sign in here

Listening to articles is free for open-access content—explore other articles or learn more about text-to-speech.
‌
Save

    Share this article

"Five beds and about 10 comfy chairs in this house. So where do you sit?" tweets Two Headed Boy @leetabix)

"Five beds and about 10 comfy chairs in this house. So where do you sit?" tweets Two Headed Boy @leetabix)

The best NZ social media reckons

1. Can we take some more refugees and give up Ben, Vicky, Bel and Hadyn? (Stewart Sowman-Lund)
2. Someone I was talking to said a changing situation was a "moving beast" instead of a "moving feast". It wasn't correct but was better. (Ali Ikram)
3. I
can't put my airbud wireless headphones in without thinking of the bit in Blackadder Goes Forth where he tries to get sent home from the trenches by sticking two pencils up his nose. (Deborah Hill Cone)
4. Old journo mate reckons there's three stories you can guarantee in NZ. "Unseasonable" spring storm kills lambs is one. (Jeremy Rees)
5. Kim Hill does this magic trick where her questions morph into hand grenades as soon as they leave her mouth. (Anna Bracewell-Worrall)

Bakery left me breathless

"They looked a bit deflated, so I didn't buy them," Mat Barnes. (Spotted in Kaitaia.)
"They looked a bit deflated, so I didn't buy them," Mat Barnes. (Spotted in Kaitaia.)

Choose your words carefully
A reader writes: "My workmate used to take a little old lady he knew out and about in her wheelchair from time to time. One day he didn't make it to an appointment and when I inquired about it he told me he had to visit someone in hospital ... 'Oh,' I said, 'it wasn't that little old lady you used to push around was it?' the horrified look on our workmates' faces made it clear I should probably choose my words better."

Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.
Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.

Lipstick lawsuit
Two years ago a woman walked into a Sephora cosmetics store in Los Angeles to try on lipstick and, she says, walked out with herpes. This according to a lawsuit filed in Los Angeles Superior Court on October 26, in which the woman claims Sephora "failed to clearly warn customers about the risk of getting oral herpes from trying on lipstick". According to the complaint, the woman had never had a cold sore until she tried out the sample lipstick at the store. Now she is suing for emotional distress, the result of having an "incurable lifelong affliction", NBC News reports.

Shower becomes a bath

Shower now a bath.
Shower now a bath.

"This is the shower on the beach at Gould Reserve [Takapuna Beach] a couple days ago," writes Roger. "The water doesn't drain away. It's been like this for three weeks. I phoned the council 10 days ago: nothing. I checked today. Still the same."

This takes the biscuit

Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.

Weather you are underwhelmed by the modern Gingernut or think the Afghan is ruined by the walnut; if you are a secret fan of the Sultana Pastie or an endorser of the classic Shortbread, make you voice heard and vote for Biscuit of the Year 2017 here.

Too drunk to disembark with dignity

"A party boat pulls over to unload people in Utrecht, Netherlands," write Miss Cellenia. "You may have to watch the full video here a few times to catch all the details.The guy who steps off the boat should have waited until someone secured the craft to the shore. The force he exerts causes the boat to move back, dooming both women. The woman in white gets helped out of the water, but then falls back in all by herself. Alcohol might have been involved.Two beers make it to the dock, the woman's beer falling over immediately. The guy puts his down to help them, but it falls over, too.When the guy pulls on the woman in purple, he injures her shoulder. She has trouble convincing him that she's hurt.  So it was a disaster all around. Did I miss anything?"

Video Pick

Discover more

Opinion

Sideswipe: Lack of art appreciation

01 Nov 04:00 PM
Opinion

Sideswipe: Darn, I was after the carnivorous fruit

02 Nov 04:00 PM
Entertainment

Sideswipe: Pun perfection

05 Nov 05:46 PM
Entertainment

Sideswipe: Sophisticated Benny Hill humour lives

06 Nov 05:20 PM

October news bloopers...(Weatherman dressed as a cloud is a highlight)

Got a Sideswipe? Send your pictures, links and anecdotes to Ana at ana.samways@nzherald.co.nz

Save

    Share this article

Latest from Entertainment

Entertainment

'28 Years Later': Ralph Fiennes stars in new Danny Boyle horror film

23 Jun 08:25 AM
Entertainment

Johnny Depp has ‘empty-nest syndrome’

23 Jun 08:24 AM
Premium
Opinion

Disneyland Aotearoa: Is it a dream worth considering?

23 Jun 03:00 AM

Inside Leigh Hart’s bonkers quest to hand-deliver a SnackaChangi chip to every Kiwi

sponsored
Advertisement
Advertise with NZME.

Latest from Entertainment

'28 Years Later': Ralph Fiennes stars in new Danny Boyle horror film

'28 Years Later': Ralph Fiennes stars in new Danny Boyle horror film

23 Jun 08:25 AM

The film explores themes of survival and humanity during societal collapse.

Johnny Depp has ‘empty-nest syndrome’

Johnny Depp has ‘empty-nest syndrome’

23 Jun 08:24 AM
Premium
Disneyland Aotearoa: Is it a dream worth considering?

Disneyland Aotearoa: Is it a dream worth considering?

23 Jun 03:00 AM
British TV star says he's 'haemorrhaging money' running $30m NZ estate

British TV star says he's 'haemorrhaging money' running $30m NZ estate

21 Jun 10:53 PM
Why wallpaper works wonders
sponsored

Why wallpaper works wonders

NZ Herald
  • About NZ Herald
  • Meet the journalists
  • Newsletters
  • Classifieds
  • Help & support
  • Contact us
  • House rules
  • Privacy Policy
  • Terms of use
  • Competition terms & conditions
  • Our use of AI
Subscriber Services
  • NZ Herald e-editions
  • Daily puzzles & quizzes
  • Manage your digital subscription
  • Manage your print subscription
  • Subscribe to the NZ Herald newspaper
  • Subscribe to Herald Premium
  • Gift a subscription
  • Subscriber FAQs
  • Subscription terms & conditions
  • Promotions and subscriber benefits
NZME Network
  • The New Zealand Herald
  • The Northland Age
  • The Northern Advocate
  • Waikato Herald
  • Bay of Plenty Times
  • Rotorua Daily Post
  • Hawke's Bay Today
  • Whanganui Chronicle
  • Viva
  • NZ Listener
  • Newstalk ZB
  • BusinessDesk
  • OneRoof
  • Driven Car Guide
  • iHeart Radio
  • Restaurant Hub
NZME
  • About NZME
  • NZME careers
  • Advertise with NZME
  • Digital self-service advertising
  • Book your classified ad
  • Photo sales
  • NZME Events
  • © Copyright 2025 NZME Publishing Limited
TOP