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Home / Entertainment

Sideswipe: May 6: Are vampires still in?

Ana Samways
By Ana Samways
Sideswipe - ana.samways@nzherald.co.nz·NZ Herald·
5 May, 2016 05:00 PM3 mins to read

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Are vampires still in? Photo / Supplied

Are vampires still in? Photo / Supplied

Ana Samways
Opinion by Ana SamwaysLearn more

Lovely ladies to the rescue

"I was trying to get to my biology exam at 9am yesterday," writes Nate. "The train that I took was late, then delayed, then it eventually broke down completely at Otahuhu station (one station before my stop). By this time I was already slightly late and understandably pretty stressed ... I decided I had no choice but to flag a passing car to beg them to drive me to school.

"Fortunately, I knocked on the window of possibly the two nicest ladies I have ever met. They agreed to drive me to school - as long as I didn't steal anything. I agreed and managed to arrive just in time for my exam. I didn't get their names, but I'd like them to know how grateful I am."

"Gone" before her time

"My mother (who passed last year after just having celebrated her 102nd birthday) was lying on her bed, staring up into the ceiling," writes Mareta. "I said hello and mother's eyes slowly shifted to me and she said: "I don't understand ... Why have they left me here?"

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I didn't understand what she meant - she lived in her own little flat in a Safe Living arrangement. I asked her to explain. "Well, when you die in hospital, they cart you away immediately, but they've just left me here," she said.

The reason for that is probably that you're still alive, I said. Utterly surprised, mother said: "I am? Oh, bother."

"One day, Jørn Utzon was thinking about his new commission as he loaded the dishwasher," tweets @ianduhig. Photo / Supplied
"One day, Jørn Utzon was thinking about his new commission as he loaded the dishwasher," tweets @ianduhig. Photo / Supplied

Outrageous custody claims

I worked on a custody dispute between a mother and grandmother, where both sides were absolutely outraged by the other's claims.

The mother was very upset that she was alleged to have been a stripper. "I was a prostitute, but I was never a stripper!"

The grandmother, in return, was furious that she was alleged to have 21 cats in her 2-bedroom apartment. "We only have 17 cats! How dare she flat-out lie and say that we have 21 cats."

The child ended up living with the father, in a different state.

Good read #1: The message about weight loss is this: "As long as you get on that bike or treadmill, you can keep indulging - and still lose weight. It's been reinforced by fitness gurus, celebrities, food and beverage companies like PepsiCo and Coca-Cola, and even public-health officials, doctors, and the first lady of the United States. Countless gym memberships, fitness tracking devices, sports drinks, and workout videos have been sold on this promise.There's just one problem: This message is not only wrong, it's leading us astray in our fight against obesity..."

Discover more

Opinion

Sideswipe: Personal circumcisions

01 May 05:00 PM
Opinion

Sideswipe: Hold the massage, thanks

02 May 05:00 PM
Opinion

Sideswipe: May 4: A pint of happiness, please

03 May 05:00 PM
Opinion

Sideswipe: Defensive driving?

04 May 05:00 PM

Good read #2: Chris Sebela started a kickstarter campaign to give him $10,000 so he could write a comic book about the experience of living in America's scariest motel - the Clown Motel - for 30 days. Then when the goal was reached, he knew he had to go through with it...Read more here.

Got a Sideswipe? Send your pictures, links and anecdotes to Ana at ana.samways@nzherald.co.nz

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