Old school pranks
One of the most exquisite of phone hoaxes was one executed by Dr Carl Bosch when he was a student in Germany. He happened to work in a lab several floors up, where from his window he could clearly see into a block of flats across the road. He found out someone who lived here was a newspaper correspondent, so Bosch phoned him pretending to be his old professor. Excitedly he explained to the journalist that he had just invented a marvellous system of television (the date was 1933) which you could clip on to an ordinary telephone set, look into it and see the person you were speaking to at the other end. Of course, the journalist was incredulous. The 'professor' then offered to demonstrate the system to him, inviting him to point the telephone towards the middle of his room, then stand in front of it and do anything that he liked, such as standing on one leg, after he'd done something odd the 'professor' would describe to him exactly what he'd done. The result was a rave article in the local newspaper.
Punctuation essential
Rick and three associates spent the week before Queen's Birthday weekend hunting white tail deer on Stewart Island. "We picked up provisions, emailed to the supermarket in Invercargill and discovered we had 19 dozen size 8 eggs! A missing comma in the order and an incorrect tally by the packer exacerbated the mistake. Managed to lay off two dozen to the tramper (he had to take them if he wanted the leg of venison on offer) and two breakfasts of two dozen scrambled eggs, maybe 4 dozen more used…left the rest for incoming party to the hut - lifetime of ribbing for Rick."
Bigfoot is real
Porkies about bacon
Why yesterday's bacon sign specified that it contained pork…Clearly well-travelled, Dennis Martin writes: "Clearly you have led a somewhat sheltered life which has included a lack of travel to predominately Muslin nations. If you had, you would know the various types of bacon available including beef and chicken bacon and the most popular, turkey bacon. Hence the requirement to spell out that this is pork bacon."
Continued flatulence
"In Northern English (Cheshire / Lancashire not sure about Yorkshire) to
fart is to "Trump," writes Jonathan. Pauline Merritt of Hamilton writes: "Growing up in East London in the 40s the term for letting off, or farting, was 'Letting Jimmy out of prison". Often accusingly said – "Who just let Jimmy out of prison?"
