1. For years I have called the microwave in the kitchen, "the cooking telly".
2. My mate calls gewurztraminer, "gear box trauma" (yes, on purpose) and insulating tape has been "insulting tape" for many years.
3. A few years ago a not-so-bright workmate caused hilarity in the smoko room when he sternly instructed another workmate - "Don't come the raw prune with me!"
4. A snobbish colleague continually referred to his effluent friends.
5. A friend of ours, while holidaying overseas, was chatting to foreigners in a swimming pool. "Have you heard of Maori people? They are our deciduous people," he was heard to say.
6. A property came up on my Facebook newsfeed with the headline describing a house in Te Atatu Peninsula as "UNMOLESTED". I commented on the post asking what that meant. The response came back "untouched" - not really an appropriate way to describe a house that hadn't been done up.
Got a Sideswipe? Send your pictures, links and anecdotes to Ana at ana.samways@nzherald.co.nz
