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Home / Entertainment

Sideswipe: December 29: Op Shop Finds

Ana Samways
By Ana Samways
Sideswipe - ana.samways@nzherald.co.nz·NZ Herald·
28 Dec, 2021 04:00 PM3 mins to read

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Ana Samways
Opinion by Ana SamwaysLearn more

The worst seat in the plane

Mid-flight on December 21st, 2004, "disgusted" with the location of his seat due to its proximity to the lavatory, a Continental Airlines passenger wrote the following letter of complaint to the airline's headquarters.

"I am disgusted as I write this note to you about the miserable experience, I am having sitting in seat 29E on one of your aircrafts. As you may know, this seat is situated directly across from the lavatory, so close that I can reach out my left arm and touch the door. All my senses are being tortured simultaneously. It's difficult to say what the worst part about sitting in 29E really is. Is it the stench of the sanitation fluid that's blown all over my body every 60 seconds when the door opens? Is it the wooosh of the constant flushing? ... I constructed a stink-shield by shoving one end of a blanket into the overhead compartment — while effective in blocking at least some of the smell, and offering a small bit of privacy...

I am picturing a board room, full of executives giving props to the young promising engineer that figured out how to squeeze an additional row of seats on to this plane by putting them next to the LAV. Worse yet, is I've paid over $400.00 for the honour of sitting in this seat! ... I am filled with a deep hatred for your plane designer and a general dis-ease that may last for hours. We are finally descending, and soon I will be able to tear down the stink-shield, but the scars will remain. I suggest that you initiate immediate removal of this seat from all of your crafts. Just remove it, and leave the smouldering brown hole empty, a good place for sturdy/non-absorbing luggage maybe, but not human cargo."

Don't be this caller

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Reality of reality TV

I was on set for the filming of Ghost Hunters. On the show, they are "investigating" an upper level of the Buffalo Central Terminal when they hear a "disembodied" voice say "Get out!" It was the property manager on a lower-level yelling at some homeless people to clear out. Everyone knew it was him, but it somehow made it in the show as an "unexplained" event.

Final words

1. "Nasa just hired 24 theologians to assess how the world would react if we discovered alien life and I have a feeling this subplot in the season finale of 2021 is planting the seeds for the main storyline of 2022." (@davenewworld)
2. "Just found out my grandpa replies 'okay' to every spam email and text." (@samlymatters)
3. "I don't have a single new password left in me." (@TravelingAnna)

Discover more

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26 Dec 04:00 PM
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Sideswipe: The mask nativity

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Sideswipe: Never give labour-saving devices at Christmas

22 Dec 04:00 PM
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