Sideswipe: August 9: Wife's Freddy jumper

Sideswipe - ana.samways@nzherald.co.nz·NZ Herald·

8 Aug, 2017 05:00 PM3 mins to read

Opinion by Ana SamwaysLearn more

"Yesterday, my wife Willow - who is NOT a horror fan - returned from the Op Shop with a fetching red and green jumper," writes Johnny in Howick. 'Nice jumper, Freddy,' I said. She won't wear it again now, but saw the funny side enough to pose for a photo ... I have to admit though, Willow's got the better complexion. She's better with kids too."

News nostalgia from 1993

A British rock fan was so absorbed listening to "trance" music on headphones that he failed to notice a light aircraft had crashed in his garden. Daniel Arthure, 20, did not hear the Cessna 150 plane smashing into the lawn of his home near Bembridge airport on the Isle of Wight on Thursday and did not notice the frantic rescue of its two injured passengers. "I was listening to a really good ambient dance track I had just recorded when it happened," he said. "The music is known as trance music, and I suppose I was in a bit of a trance."

Bitter cost of climate change

The Aral Sea was once a large lake between the borders of Kazakhstan and Uzbekistan. But global climate change has meant the lake has virtually disappeared, leaving the area an arid wasteland. The lake has shrunk 90 per cent after a Soviet plan in the 1960s to re-route several of the rivers feeding it. But most of the water has evaporated thanks to the increase in global temperatures. The area was once a prosperous fishing location with numerous towns that helped boost the economies of both border nations, but it's now a dead zone, with old fishing boats littering the desert landscape. The Aral Sea is now known as the Aralkum Desert. (Via listverse.com)

Sexy slapdown the kids can't un-hear

Ian writes: "When I found out there was 'a certified Microsoft agent' on the line I pretended that I was naked and this was an 0900 sex-line call. They hung up REAL quick, but my grown-up kids - who were in the room at the time - were in total shock until I explained. Don't mess with a 60-year-old grandfather."

Veterinary time-wasters

"Took my cat to the vet for a lump on its leg," writes Dave Fermah. "The vet looked me in the eye and said with a sigh, 'If your cat has a lump in the same exact place on its opposite leg it's meant to be there.' The only thing that got removed that day was some cash from my wallet."

Zombie beer

"This van is outside the Strahov Monastery in the Jewish Quarter of Prague's Old town," writes a reader. "The monks there seem to have a sense of humour, which is displayed in the van's logo for the beer they produce. The zombies walking through the graveyard seem to be the depressed souls referred to."

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