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Shoulder pads are back in vogue then. Preferably big jutting ones like American football players might wear. Lady Gaga looked hot in them, at least. And her many other outfits, including a black leather bikini, a mint coloured Cubist dress, and what a friend described as a Nuns habit made
out of a condom, were skimpy yet somehow classy.
The New York pop starlet's two hour show at Vector Arena was utterly over the top - from the giant shoulder pads, to the Amazonian bloke wearing knee-high leather boots, black undies, and wielding two tambourines.
And this was a family show too with young kids and their folks getting down to Poker Face and Paparazzi alongside the thousands of "little monsters" who had dressed up for the occasion.
Then again, extravagance and glam is what the world has come to expect from a girl who two years ago was a no name and now she's the biggest pop star on the planet.
Gaga - real name Stefani Germanotta - has done pretty well for herself. Following the release of debut album, The Fame, in August 2008 and thanks to hits like Just Dance and Poker Face, she has grown into a fearsome phenomenon.
She was here 10 months ago supporting the Pussycat Dolls, and upstaged them that night. Now Gaga's the star and the scale of this show blows away anything veteran pop superstars Beyonce, Kylie, and Madonna could muster.
The show is a spectacle with a full band and troupe of dancers, multiple costume changes, and special effects including everything from a burning piano through to a scary monster who looks like a deep sea fish, giant squid, and some sort of Doctor Who creature morphed into one.
While the show is based around a slightly weak story about getting to the Monster Ball on time, as the epic ballad Speechless, a frenzied Poker Face, and finales Paparazzi and shredding pop single Bad Romance, prove, the songs stand up on their own.
And Gaga might not be the best dancer, nor a great singer with an often droll Madonnaesque tone, but she has the intrigue, star power, and pluck to pull it off.
Special mention also has to go to those thousands of adoring fans who dressed up in Gaga outfits that were both fruity (pink bows and lightning bolt face tattoos) and flirty, like the brave few with leotards and fishnets, or, as another friend put it, "the chicks with no pants on".
Still, nothing was quite as naughty - and often down-right dirty - as Gaga. All hail the new queen of pop.
Where? Vector Arena, March 13
