KEY POINTS:
Confrontational, switched off, disruptive - no, not another day in Parliament, but close. It's the worst kids that British schools have to offer in new reality show The Unteachables (TV One, Fridays, 8.30pm).
In last week's first episode you had to wonder at the contradiction of taking a teacher with a superhuman ability to turn problem kids around by getting them to see a bit of good in themselves, while putting those kids in a telly show that's labelling them a lost cause.
Still, while the troubled teens may be being exploited, things could be worse. At least they're not being given a humiliating dressing-down by Trinny and Susannah or, like one poor council estate family, about to be patronised to about their eating habits by the Duchess of York.
The star of this show, "teacher of the year" Phil Beadle, is actually a figure worthy of deepest admiration. He's highly skilled, unconventional, tough yet warm and smart enough never to underestimate his charges.
The support crew are pretty impressive, too, with their saintly determination to find some, any, good in the most undeserving pupil. As education expert Ted Wragg says of one particularly taxing student: "She's got physical courage - she'd be all right in a war."
There are handy hints in this show, and not just for teachers. Apparently an effective way of getting unruly students to sit still and concentrate is to tell them that, while they might not be good with words and numbers, they have "body intelligence".
Many of us know how that feels - 15 minutes after clocking on at the office, the body is already protesting it's far too smart to be there.
The show has other highlights. While some Year 9s might be bent on being as uncharismatic a human being as possible, they still can't help giving us a laugh.
"Grace has been offered anger management but says just the thought of it makes her angry," the narrator tells us.
It's hard to argue with Dale's relentless logic: "You do something well, you get praise for it. Mind you, I do something naughty and I get praise for it as well - from my mates."
Beadle somehow wins the kids over by pulling off the feat of being a teacher and a mate, without having the kids laughing at the sad old guy trying to be cool.
The ex-rock musician and natural performer even gets away with such potentially dorky teaching methods as kung fu-style punctuation. And he feels surprisingly free to talk about adoring and being besotted by his students.
But for all its admirable educational qualities, you can't escape the fact this is makeover telly show business as usual, with Beadle trying to turn around a group of diehard 14-year-olds in just two weeks.
If the interests of the kids were really in the makers' hearts, Beadle would be offered a more realistic and long-term challenge. The kids will be booted back into the conventional classroom just as they've got used to someone telling them exactly how smart they are.
