Elliot Hegarty, a film and TV director who most recently worked on the steamy Disney+ series Rivals. Photo / Getty Images
Elliot Hegarty, a film and TV director who most recently worked on the steamy Disney+ series Rivals. Photo / Getty Images
From introducing intimacy co-ordinators to making sure the nitty-gritty is believable, here’s how to knock it out of the park.
Sex sells. It has always sold and will go on selling far into the future. In the United States, data from UCLA may suggest adolescents are no longerinterested in watching sex on television, but the problem with polls, particularly about sex, is people tend to say what they think they should, rather than what they actually believe.
I mean, have you ever met a young person uninterested in sex?
To deprive stories on television of sex is to overlook a vital narrative tool. In a world where naturalism and realism in storytelling hold such currency, it is also ignoring a huge part of life. Most people do it and a lot of people enjoy it – even if those folks at UCLA believe teenagers no longer do.
So, as someone who has directed television shows such as Rivals on Disney+ and Cheaters on BBC One, which feature a whole load of high-end how’s-your-father – here’s my impassioned defence of the sex scene, and the rules for knocking it out of the park.
In a story, sex, like comedy, is a delivery system for interesting ideas and concepts. They inform you while you are being entertained. It is the same in all art. In Ancient Greece, the marble nudes would have small penises to convey the idea that these great men were not governed by earthly desires, but were in fact governed by intellect and civilisation. The small penis was a status symbol, a humble brag.
In television today, we use sex to tackle thorny issues relating to relationships, class and power. These sex scenes act like fight scenes in an action movie or a song in a musical. They are a storytelling device, often used to relieve tension.
A good sex scene comes after a ratcheting up of sexual or emotional tension in the story and the sex provides a release, allowing you then to enjoy a long period of talking heads without fidgeting in your seat. This is the ebb and flow of storytelling. In my pitch about filming the sex scenes for both Rivals and Cheaters, I told the producers I wanted to shoot them in the same way Martin Scorsese shot the fight scenes in Raging Bull. Each fight in that film was shot and edited differently depending on Jake LaMotta’s (Robert De Niro) state of mind – be it paranoia, anger or catharsis.
Sometimes we’re inside the ring with De Niro; it’s frenetic, they’re handheld shots and full of quick edits. Other times it’s a single fluid shot gracefully circling the ropes in slow-motion as he fights. I wanted to do the same in my sex scenes – what are the characters feeling emotionally, why are they having sex, who’s in charge, does that change during the scene? A sex scene is a conversation without dialogue. There is always a point wanting to be made, someone’s always leading it and that might change at any moment.
2. Always use an intimacy co-ordinator
Visualising a sex scene always starts with the script. More often than not, the writer, producers and I discuss what the “conversation” being had in the bedroom or up against a wall is (or inside the cramped confines of a supersonic jet’s loo).
We then bring in the intimacy co-ordinator (IC), a new and vital role on a film set. I wouldn’t shoot a dance scene without a choreographer, or a stunt scene without a stunt co-ordinator, because we want to protect the actors and have someone who is an expert in visualising these things on screen. In the same way, I wouldn’t work without an IC. They have fast become a vital cog in the film-making machine and act as a conduit between a director and the actors.
A sex scene is a conversation without dialogue. Photo / Dean O’Gorman
3. Make the orgasms believable
With the IC, we discuss what the story point of the sex scene is, and the location. We then get down to the nitty-gritty and talk about sexual positions, levels of nudity and have hilarious conversations about who orgasms first and ask: “Is this position even possible?” For instance, in the aforementioned plane toilet in the opening scene of Rivals, Dominic Treadwell-Collins’ brilliant script noted that Rupert Campbell-Black gives the journalist Beattie Johnson “the most glorious, ecstatic, New-Year’s-Eve-firework-display orgasm”. But how? Most women don’t orgasm from penetration alone, so our fantastic IC, Yarit Dor, suggested Rupert manually stimulate Beattie at the same time and bingo! The scene made sense from both points of view and it suddenly became believable that her orgasm was “glorious”.
Danny Dyer as Freddie Jones and Lisa McGrillis as Valerie Jones in Rivals. Photo / Disney+
4. Get the talent on board
The actors must be included in these conversations. Once the sequence has been mapped out with the IC, there is a discussion with the actors about the vision, hopes and ideas for the scene. When they’re on board and have contributed to the creation of the sequence, my position is that even if they have signed on the dotted line, they can change their mind at any point. Not a problem. That is their prerogative. They might suddenly feel like they don’t want to get naked in front of a crew of people (even if it’s what’s called a “closed set”, it can still be intimidating), and who could blame them? There’s always space for a change of direction.
David Tennant, Alex Hassell, Aidan Turner, Emily Atack and Nafessa Williams in Rivals (2024). Photo / Disney
5. Hold the actors’ hands (metaphorically speaking) while they’re in the act
In my experience, when you’re shooting a sex scene everything tends to flow after the awkward first shot is out of the way. I’ll talk actors through all the moves while the cameras are running – “Put your hand there. Lift your head. Move your leg out of the light” – so it couldn’t be further from “sexy”.
Like any form of storytelling, when a sex scene is done badly it’s dull to watch or, an even greater crime, pointless. If the sex isn’t moving the story forward or deepening your understanding of a character, then it’s just sex for sex’s sake. And that’s porn.
But once the actors realise they’re protected, they usually just relax, and you all start laughing at how ridiculous it is. Because you’re telling a great story. That’s when you know you’re doing it right.
Elliot Hegarty is a film and TV director working in the UK and US, with production credits on shows including Rivals, Ted Lasso, Cheaters, Trying and Lovesick.
