After the self-appointed gatekeepers of men's fashion were swiftly extradited for bullying a sensitive young man from Invercargill, a wave of hopeful speculation swept the nation. Who would their replacements be?
Two names absolutely nobody suggested, and for good reason: X Factor Australia stalwart Natalie Bassingthwaighte and hard-rock drummer Shelton Woolright.
3. Good Morning getting the chop
Over the past 19 golden years TV One's Good Morning hosted a surprisingly diverse array of interviews, music, cooking, aerobics and strange crafts in its daily timeslot. It had a strong and loyal audience, and with costs offset by the endless advertorial breaks it can't have been that expensive to broadcast.
Nevertheless, TV One announced they were pulling the plug this year, saying it wanted to focus on prime-time programming.
2. The death of current affairs journalism at TV3
The long, drawn-out demise of Campbell Live was easily the year's biggest TV downbuzz. All that MediaWorks "review period" crap! Bad times.
Then a few months down the track it happened all over again with 3D! Really bad times.
1. Art jilting Dani on The Bachelor
Over time we have come to accept and maybe even love Art and Matilda, but at the time The Bachelor's decision went down like a badly mixed espresso martini.
Even Sky Sport presenter Stephen McIvor was moved to weigh in on Twitter - the first and only time he has ever tweeted about something that isn't motorsport or rugby league. A monumentally disappointing moment.
But it wasn't all doom and gloom and broken bachelorette hearts. There were unexpected rays of sunshine on the New Zealand free-to-air landscape as well.
Here are five happy TV surprises of the year:
5. Come Dine With Me NZ's wonderful weirdos
The local version of the popular British cooking show was delivered a deadly hospital pass by TV3 when it was fast-tracked to replace Campbell Live at 7pm.
On paper it should have been an abomination, but the show unearthed a surprisingly high caliber of wacky talent, almost on a par with its British forebear, while Guy Williams' narration gave it a uniquely Kiwi twist. Naturally, it was cancelled after one series.
4. Simon Barnett redefines the dadbod
When he first strode out onto the Dancing With the Stars dance floor Simon Barnett looked like he was living out a very specific recurring nightmare.
But over the following weeks he flourished, setting the celebrity dancing world on fire and singlehandedly redefining the word "dadbod" with his inexplicably toned and taut physique.
3. Maori TV's World Forklift League
Forklift driving was the sport nobody realised they needed until one day there it was in all its glory on a Thursday night on Maori TV.
Filmed in Dunedin, hosted by Mike King and commentated by Dale Husband, the show featured a variety of speed and skill-based forklift obstacle courses. An instant classic of weird New Zealand TV.
2. One's thrilling Sunday nights
Easily the best thing on TV One all year was its Sunday Theatre season. The four feature-length dramas were based on New Zealand crimes and mysteries, lending them a particularly dark edge. The pick of them was probably The Monster of Mangatiti, which interwove real-life interviews with the victim of the crime and drama based on her experience. Chilling stuff.
1. The Bachelor NZ turns out to be actually kind of really good
New Zealand was rightfully skeptical about a local version of this romantic reality franchise. We just don't really "do" dating, especially not on this grand scale. But in a hit-and-miss year for TV3's reality line-up, this was by far the best and most successful.
Dorky hunk Art Green was an inspired choice to be our first Bachelor, and the show reflected our own awkward and slightly stilted version of romance, which made it all the more endearing and enjoyable.
- nzherald.co.nz
