KEY POINTS:
Sir Michael Gough has come down in the world. Death taxes, three failed marriages and total incompetence at just about everything except drinking means Michael is meeting old age alone, flat broke.
When English novelist Sam North's marvellously dry The Old Country opens, 67-year-old Michael has long
vacated the aristocratic family pile, Sitten Hall, now run by the despised National Trust in cahoots with wife number three. He is living in a freezing, damp barn, rent-free in exchange for some handyman work around the place. But he is handy at nothing, which could be a metaphor for his life.
Michael's barn, just out of Bath, is piled high with mouldering junk from Sitten Hall, but his "best friends" are his ancient telly and computer, on which he feeds his addiction to eBay and poshtotty.com.
Food, or the lack thereof, is an issue, though not on Sundays because that's the day he has lunch in Bath with his slightly younger brother Philip and his much younger Polish wife, Natalia. Michael is quite envious that Philip has a Natalia.
There was a time when he would have liked a Natalia himself, as we discover later on in the book. The day the novel opens is one of those free-food Sundays, so Michael hops into his ancient Land Rover, drives dangerously into town, picks up Philip and Natalia's three kids - "he felt a twinge of jealousy" - and goes to fetch his wheelchair-bound mother from her rest-home. Granny Banana, 93, so-called because she has a curved spine, is "as thin and crisp and fresh as a bit of dry-cleaning".
Loaded into the back, Granny falls victim to one of the Land Rover's many safety issues. Her written wish is to have her ashes buried with those of her favourite dog - at Sitten Hall. The onus is on Michael to see this through. But Natalia, who has a will of iron, has already made the arrangements.
To save money, Granny Banana will be farewelled for free in the conference room of the hotel Natalia manages, and her ashes buried in the hotel garden. "Is the cost, Michael," Natalia tells him firmly.
Ashamed, for he has no money/power, Michael is going to fight back, at the age of 67. It's going to be a case of Michael's incompetence versus Michael's determination. Among so many things to like in The Old Country is its clever structure.
North, winner of the Somerset Maugham prize for his first book, The Automatic Man, has divided the narrative into three parts, each going back in time to a crucial stage in Michael's deterioration. With the knowledge of what has happened later in Michael's life, and to the other characters, the process of going backwards as they stumble forward is both illuminating and droll.
The book ends at Sitten Hall, where Michael still resides and his daughter Mattie is getting married. Self-absorbed Michael is strongly against this marriage - mainly on the grounds that all of his have failed - and decides to watch the horses on the telly instead. Granny has gone missing - and so has the remote to Michael's telly.
Crisis! A perceptive, sly and funny book, which is heartily recommended.
The Old Country
By Sam North (Pocket Books/Simon & Schuster $23.99)
