Eminem rapped over 'violent' chart-topper

Rihanna and Eminem's controversial song has been top of the NZ charts for 4 weeks. Photo / Supplied

A chart-topping song by rapper Eminem and singer Rihanna glamourises domestic abuse, family advocates say.

The Love The Way You Lie video shows a girl, played by Megan Fox, and her boyfriend, played by Dominic Monaghan, hugging in bed before she sees another woman's phone number written on his hand.

Fox, who donated her pay for the video to a women's shelter in Santa Monica, starts whacking him, spits in his face and tries to leave.

Throughout the video, the couple lash out at each other, followed by moments of passion. The last scenes show their house burning down and the boyfriend delivering a final blow to the girl, followed by an image of her sitting on the bed with a black eye. The song has been top of the charts in New Zealand for four weeks.

Eminem, seen singing in a field, promises it won't happen again and says "next time I'm pissed, I'll aim my fist at the dry wall" - but admits he's lying and that if she tries to leave again he'll "tie her to the bed and set the house on fire".

He says the couple fall back into the same routine "like a broken record" and a scantily clad Rihanna, a victim of domestic abuse herself, admits in the chorus, which she sings in front of the burning house, that she likes "the way it hurts".

The song has been in the top 10 for seven weeks, and No1 for four.

Monaghan has said it is based on the story of Eminem and ex-wife Kim's "tumultuous relationship", which has been the subject of several of his songs, one in which he fantasised about killing her.

Rihanna, whose ex-boyfriend rapper Chris Brown was convicted for attacking her before the Grammy Awards last year, has been quoted as saying the song was "something that I understood, something I connected with" and that Eminem's lyrics "basically just broke down the cycle of domestic violence".

But Kiri Hannifin of Women's Refuge said the video "verges on glamorising" abuse.

"While the lyrics and video are violent, I think that most people will see Rihanna in the video and make the link to her recent abusive relationship.

"While I worry that the depiction of violence in the song verges on glamorising it, I do on balance think it's positive that the issue of domestic violence is debated, especially among young people who are, in the main, the audience.

"The sad fact is that what's depicted in the song is actually true to life and hopefully the backgrounds of both Rihanna and Eminem give it some context because unlike the video, domestic violence is not about love and it's not sexy and it's certainly not glamorous in any way."

Mary Zefirelli, from Safer Homes in New Zealand Everyday, said Rihanna might now be regarded as spokeswoman for abuse.

"It is incredibly important to highlight to young people that what is portrayed in this song/video is not love. In this song, she is the voice of the victim - and the song seems to suggest she is to be judged as a victim.

"However, the victim is never to blame for abuse.

"The focus should be on challenging the behaviour of the perpetrator and putting the responsibility for this behaviour squarely on the offender."