How we start our day has a covertly powerful influence on how the rest of the day rolls out
You know how sometimes the day can just start off all wrong, and then go rapidly downhill from there?
I am sure you know the feeling. There is a reason that “getting out of bed on the wrong side” is a phrase we use when someone is being grumpy and obtuse. How we start our day has a covertly powerful influence on how the rest of the day rolls out.
A deliberately created morning routine is one small thing we can do for ourselves that has a disproportionally large impact on how our day unfolds.
The energy with which you start your day is pivotal — it sets the tone for what is to come — so take control and get out of bed on the right side. Your whole day will be better for it.
Here are eight strategies to help you get out of bed on the right side.
1. Prep a bit the night before
If you have the juicer out on the bench you are far more likely to use it. Similarly, if the kitchen is clean and tidy you are far more likely to prepare a healthy breakfast.
What small tasks can you square away the night before that will add ease and flow to your morning?
Identify the things that are your most common morning irritants. Maybe it’s deciding what to wear and a heap of outfit changes. Or never having an ironed shirt. Putting the lunch boxes together under pressure or finding the sports kit.
Identify your top three morning irritants and make a plan to eliminate them the night before (pick the outfit, iron the shirt, sort the lunch box, find the cricket bat).
If you can resolve the top three irritants in advance, you are already on the way to a much easier start.
My top three morning irritations are
1 ......................................, which I can resolve/lessen by ......................................
2 ......................................, which I can resolve/lessen by ......................................
3 ......................................, which I can resolve/lessen by ......................................
2. Set expectations
Few of us live in a bubble, so other people in our domestic situation play a role in how our morning starts. This is a good time to reset some expectations on tasks and timing expected in the morning so everyone can have an easier start.
Maybe the kids are older and it’s a reasonable expectation that they make their own bed or pack their own bag? Maybe your partner is always late out the door and that makes you late too. Or the friend you get a ride with lets you down often and turns up late.
Check any expectations that it would be a good idea to reset or redefine so your morning has a calmer start. One conversation could make a massive difference.
I’d like to reset this expectation .............................. with .................................. so that
.......................................................................................................................................
3. What sets you up for the day?
What’s your number one non-negotiable? Having 15 minutes to meditate? Maybe a four-minute shower without anyone sticking their head in and screaming “Muuuuuum!”
This is deeply individual. What do you need to set you up best for the day? Identify one non-negotiable — if it’s just one thing, you are far more likely to make it happen than if it’s a whole list (walk the dog, then a green juice while reading the paper, a little yoga, then off to work). Too hard and too many.
Pick one and make it your non-negotiable for setting your mood.
My non-negotiable morning good mood-setter is
.................................................................................................................................
4. Get grateful before your feet even hit the floor
This is such a good tip for bringing more ease and lightness to your morning. When you press snooze on your alarm* start listing things in your life you are grateful for.
Happy moments from the previous day. Just start listing them and developing this as a habit. You will probably snooze back off but this at least gets your brain with the programme that we are now choosing to start the day on a positive note.
You will be surprised how quickly this becomes a habit: Alarm beep. Oh, okay, what was good about yesterday? What were my happy moments? What am I grateful for? It breaks the bad habit of waking up and within seconds being on the anxiety train of “oh God, I’ve got to get X done today, and then Y is probably going to…” while you are still between the sheets.
Break the habit by establishing a new, far more empowered habit of starting your thoughts each morning with appreciation.
*Unless you are some kind of human unicorn who bounces out of bed before their alarm trilling “I’m a morning person, hello world”, in which case, you need no help, you’ve got it covered.
5. What would I like to go right today?
One of the reasons we sometimes have a bad day is because we self-create it by expecting to have a bad day. We wake up and our mind automatically starts off on a train of thought about how underprepared we are about that meeting, and that we are going to be really pushed to get to the dentist and back, and I bet the traffic will be really bad too and if Tom doesn’t sort that thing out like he promised … and so on.
It’s a really easy train of thought to follow, we start with one thing that might not go that well, and then it links seamlessly to another and another, so before we know it we are stressed out about our day before we are even out of our pyjamas.
You can change this by consciously directing your thought. We humans can have a real tendency to gravitate towards the negative without realising it, so help yourself turn that around by popping a post-it note on the bathroom mirror where you clean your teeth. As you brush, ask yourself the very deliberate question What could go RIGHT today? And then link that to something else that could go well, or that you can think of an ideal outcome. Start deliberately challenging your focus towards the positive.
What are three things that could go right today? What would be an ideal outcome?
1 ................................................................................................................
2 ................................................................................................................
3 ................................................................................................................
6. Stop looking at technology first thing
I know I go on about this a lot. Technology is our friend, and so fantastic in so many ways, but honestly, if you are looking for a day that’s calm, focused and full of fun/achievement/peace of mind/whatever it is you are after, then checking your email and social media when you are still in bed or shuffling about in your PJs is not going to serve that.
Unless you are a heart surgeon or similar, no email is that important/time sensitive it cannot wait 15-30 minutes while you ease yourself into your morning. When you check your tech you are immediately taking yourself out of your own agenda and headspace and immediately putting yourself into someone else’s.
Reading that email about the problem with production splits your mental focus before the day even begins. It takes the focus off you, and what you (and your family) need to set you up optimally for the day, and puts a large percentage of it in the office/school/someone else’s stuff.
Start the day in your own stuff. If you want to be calm, happier, more successful in whatever it is you are into — have those few moments at the start of the day, focused on what you want. It will allow you to start the day with clarity and perspective.
I commit to not checking my tech, and staying in my own stuff until ................ am.
7. What three words would I like to describe my day today?
Living with intention is a powerful change. Rather than being at the mercy of what’s going on “out there” you have an internal intentionality about what you want to bring to your day.
One of the easiest ways to do this is to set yourself three intention words for the day that set the scene for how you would like this day to unfold. It could be Focus+ Calm + Joy. Or, Fun + Ease + Flow. Whatever you want to GET from your day, and whatever you want to BRING to your day.
So, if things go a little pear-shaped, it’s being able to wait longer than you wanted at the dentist and say “How can I bring Focus + Calm + Content to this situation? It might be taking the opportunity to read a magazine that is actually a bit of an unexpected treat, or it might be to chat to the receptionist and brighten her day, or it might be to have some clear time and aim to clear 10 emails.
Rather than railing against the situation, anchor back to your intention set in the clear morning air to BRING and RECEIVE Focus + Calm + Content that day.
My three intention words today are:
..................................... + ..................................... + .....................................
8. How would my body like to start the day?
Starting your body right at the start of the day has a profound effect on how you feel physiologically through the day. If you ask your body what it would like to best start the day it might say “hot water and lemon, please” or “a green juice, thank you” rather than the traditional industrial-strength espresso.
We have such delicately balanced systems that respond well and quickly — taking a moment to step back and look at your regular morning routine to see if it might need a change in terms of food/drink/exercise commitment to best honour it will allow you to feel better not just in mind but in body as your day develops.
What my body REALLY wants to start the day is
.......................................................................................................................
Boom! I have now given you eight strategies to start your day off right. They will enable you to have a better day more of the time. The energy with which you start your day is pivotal — it sets the tone for what is to come — so take control and get out of bed on the right side tomorrow. Your whole day will be better for it.
Louise Thompson is a life coach, author and corporate escapee. Through her online happiness programme Wellbeing Warriors, Louise helps people unlock their happiest and healthiest life. Read Bite articles from Louiseor visit louisethompson.com for more.