Last week we looked at why we can put off making big decisions and the fact that by continually not making a decision we ARE making a decision. We are making a decision over and over and over again, not to decide and to live with the split energy of an unresolved situation hanging over us. Continually choosing not to decide IS making a decision.
We also talked about that with the big things in life, sometimes logic may not be enough to reach a decision. But that deep down, sometimes really deep down, that there is a part of you that does know the answer, and if you get quiet that wisdom from within will reveal itself.
The last point I want to make on this is that SOME DECISIONS ARE JUST HARD. Seriously. This one is obvious but it needs saying! Some decisions that we can sit on and faff about endlessly with for years — they are BIG DECISIONS. So,they are likely to have BIG CONSEQUENCES, not just for us but for other people too.
I have seen people sit on decisions for a decade or more, because they want the decision to come with NO CONSEQUENCES. Sometimes there are decisions to be made in life where the “no consequences” option IS JUST NOT ON THE TABLE. It’s NEVER going to be on the table.
So, stop waiting for that mythical option. If you are going to leave your spouse/job/country/social group/religion/whatever, there are going to be consequences. FACT. Stop waiting for no consequences and put that energy into figuring out smart ways to handle the consequences with capability and compassion instead.
At some point you have to stop evading decisions because they are hard, and start backing your capability to handle what comes up instead. When we say a decision is “complicated” and therefore we are not making it — what we really mean is that it’s hard. Really hard. With many consequences. But the decision itself is actually simple. We want out. Or we want in. We want to stay. Or go. The essence of it is simple.
Our kernel of truth, however, is wrapped in a very hard exterior shell that requires much strength to crack open. So if you are stalled putting off a big decision, know that we are always more capable than we think. Know you can BACK YOURSELF to handle whatever comes up: you are stronger than you know. Get all the information and support you require to make a call, then make it.
Living with the continual split energy of not making a decision on something that is important to your soul is energy draining in the extreme. It’s time to (wo)man-up and move forwards with capability, compassion and courage.
Through her online Happiness programme “Wellbeing Warriors”, life coach Louise Thompson helps people unlock their happiest and healthiest life. Sign up at louisethompson.com and find more from Louise at bite.co.nz/wellbeing