Kate Ross: Are they for real?

Matthew; Relationship status: Currently single, I've always been and always will be a heterosexual. I've never paid a prostitute or stripper.Photo / Thinkstock

Opinion

Are they for real?

Working within the recruitment industry you have the sincere pleasure of meeting so many talented people. You come across some truly inspirational and clever individuals that you feel privileged meeting and representing to clients.

However we also see the other extreme side and everything in-between. So often you will log on in the morning and have hundreds of varied applicants for your advertised roles, great. However a number of these will lack the necessary skill set for the position.

During this screening process you come across applicants that you do wonder, "is this person for real?" Let me give you some great examples:

Matthew; Relationship status:

Currently single, I've always been and always will be a heterosexual. I've never paid a prostitute or stripper.

Simon; Religion:

I've been in a Church to praise god 10 times, each time for an hour to see what they did - got nothing.

Nicola; Family:

I've never had a sibling or a Mum or Dad that's died or is about to die in the next 50 years. I've a Mum (52), Dad (51), brother (34) and a sister (29)

Miller; Ever owned or do I now own part of a house, a piece of land or a big toy?

I've owned and used 5 cars (17-now), an 8 seater van for 2 years (15-17) and a 2 wheeled motorbike for a year (5-6). I now own a laptop, ipod 80gb, xbox 360, surfboard, wet suit, car that is now all roads legal in NZ, it now works. I'll use my car to go to and from home and work. This is once you have got me a new job.

Ben; Criminal History:

All convictions I've ever got from the law is when I was aged 18 or older, on land and in New Zealand. I've never been in jail. I'll never go into a jail unless to do legal work. I've done between 100-200 hours of community service work that was given to me with force by a Ministry of Justice Court Judge.

I've been convicted for driving when drunk. I've been convicted for peeing on a vacant public tree in the dark (I needed to pee, I thought there wasn't a toilet or urinal near me and nobody could see me before I started a 10 second urination).

I used diversion the first time I could for peeing on a vacant public dry concrete at dark (I did that crime - I needed to pee, I thought there wasn't a toilet or urinal near me and nobody could see me before I started a 10 second urination). I've been convicted for resisted arrest tried to go in a bar at dark (I sprinted away for a minute before being handcuffed). I got arrested when I was aged 16 for drinking alcohol in a public place..... (I did it)

Caleb; Hobbies:

Frequently play or watch most sports (mostly rugby league, fishing, touch rugby, rugby league tag, softball and surf on a board that's 6 feet long at a beach (mostly with one or more of my friends, sometimes with myself or with one or more of my family) apart from rugby union and soccer. I've ever played 3 hours of soccer, I won't play more than 5 hours of soccer. Drink alcohol (mostly beer). I don't smoke tobacco. I've smoked and chewed tobacco, I've never blown a smoke ring, done the splits or done a double joint move.

Now most of us within the industry would be up for giving some one a chance. I'd be the first person to call a client and say "I have met this person, they don't exactly meet the brief but I'd like you to...." But even I have a limit of representation.

So yes, we do go back to them personally and advise them on what needs to be adjusted or changed to assist them with possible future employment. However in some cases, we just can't help them out.

In our busy day-to-day lives, this does add a bit of light relief I must admit.

Kate Ross

Kate Ross is director of Kinetic Recruitment