KEY POINTS:
You see it in sci-fi movies.
You see it at workshops.
It's called the "force shield".
Once the "force shield" is up, nothing can penetrate it.
The people within the shield are cocooned. And those outside are isolated.
Sticky-pairs create force-shields at workshops. So what are sticky-pairs?
Sticky-pairs
are people who know each other. Like husband and wife. Like co-workers. Like friends. Like participants who speak a common language. Or share a country/city of origin.
They stick to each other like glue. And in doing so, create a clique; a force-shield.
Your first job as a presenter or facilitator is to destroy that shield.
There are good reasons why:
* Other participants avoid sticky-pairs.
* Sticky-pairs get less working time.
* Sticky-pairs get fewer ways to solve their unique problem.
* They end up unhappy, and grumbly.
So let's quickly see what happens at a workshop.
Sticky-pairs tend to stick together at breakfast. At lunch. At dinner. And almost always sit right next to each other in a workshop.
This causes other participants to get intimidated. That's because it's two people versus one. As a result, when they bring up a problem in the group, the problem is treated as a single problem.
So if the group has one hour to work on their own business, and about 15 minutes is allocated per person to a group of four, a sticky-pair is often treated as a unit, and given less time by the group.
But that's not all. If the sticky-pair weren't so gooey, and separated into two groups, they'd find they'd get two different points of view to solve the same problem.
But because they're part of the same group, they invariably end up listening to just one angle, thus depriving the pair of different viewpoints.
If your workshop lasts for less than a day, this stickiness isn't quite as noticeable. If it lasts for a day, it tends to surface by the second tea break.
But in a three-day workshop, the sticky-pair become totally isolated.
Of course, no one isolates them on purpose, but invariably it does kick in.
You'll find sticky-pairs then get more grumbly, and are far more dissatisfied.
As you can tell, this situation isn't good for the stickies, or the group, or the facilitator.
So the best thing to do is unstick them as soon as possible.
So what's as soon as possible?
And how do you unstick them?
The sticky-pair need to be unstuck before the first workgroup session itself. The sooner they're separated, the better.
And the way to separation is an overt as well as a subtle method.
So let's look at the overt method: You tell the group about the sticky-pair syndrome and why it causes an issue.
This brings the problem of stickiness to the fore. Now the sticky-pair - and the rest of the group - are aware of the issue and, with luck, they'll quickly separate.
But luck doesn't always work. Now for the subtle approach. Any big group can be split up into smaller groups.
Let's assume they have five members, and you call those five A, B, C, D, and E.
Here's what you do next ...
You assign the letter A to the first person, B to the next, C to the next and so on. So now the first five people have the letters from A-E.
Now continue assigning letters to the group, going from A-E.
As you've figured out, the sticky pair will be A and B. Or B and C. They'll be consecutive letters, because they're seated right next to each other.
Your next command is simple. You tell all the A's in the room to form a group. And all the B's to form a group, and so on.
Aha! You've separated the sticky-pair.
But won't that make the sticky-pair feel a little unsafe? After all, the reason they got sticky in the first place was because they share a common background. And in an alien workshop, sticking together provides a sense of comfort.
And yes it does, but only for so long, because eventually the pair alienate themselves, and in turn get alienated from the group.
Bring down the force-shield.
Get the sticky-pair unstuck.
And your workshop and experience will be more sticky as a result.
* Sean D'Souza is chief executive of Psychotactics and is an international author and trainer. www.psychotactics.com
