How you can financially get through and recover from divorce - The Prosperity Project

Leaving a long marriage is never easy mentally or financially - but some simple tools can ensure you get through both quickly. Photo / 123rf

Divorce can cost more than your marriage. It can also be financially devastating. But there are ways to limit the fallout, according to one financial adviser.

Enable.me financial adviser Shelley Palman told Nadine Higgins on The Prosperity Project podcast that divorce is costly, both financially and from a mental health point of view.

As hard as it can be, Palman - who has been divorced herself and guided many clients through it - says it’s important not to let emotions take over.

“Bite your tongue and show grace, because the more you argue and bicker, it can just take a lot longer - and you can’t move on. The longer things linger, the more negative and expensive it gets.”

Palman says you can minimise legal fees by agreeing as much as possible up front - and only venting to close friends. “Keep it efficient with your lawyer.”

She says the first step is to understand your joint assets and liabilities.

“I sometimes see a person coming to see me for an initial consultation and I’ll say to them, ‘what are you expecting to leave with?’ and they have no idea the value of the house, the value of the mortgage ... the other party’s KiwiSaver balance”.

Knowing those numbers at the date of separation is important, as it can help protect you from losing out if one party goes on a spending spree.

“Then you’ve got some sort of proof that you know that person incurred those transactions after that date, and that wasn’t in relation to anything to do with you, so you’ve got a bit of a chance maybe of that being evened up in the washup”.

When children are involved, Palman says there are tools to help calculate what child support payments might be involved, including a calculator on the IRD website.

Where one party earns significantly less than the other, it’s worth exploring spousal maintenance.

“It’s designed to help them get back on their feet over a short period of time. For myself personally, it was a period of two years.”

It’s also important to update your will and insurance, she says, which can be done very quickly via your lawyer and insurance broker.

Despite the emotional and financial upheaval, Palman says there’s opportunity on the other side of divorce.

“Even though it’s a terrible thing that you’ve been through - hey, what a beautiful opportunity to design your life moving forward.”

Listen to the full episode of The Prosperity Project for more advice on the financial cost of divorce.

The podcast is hosted by Nadine Higgins, an experienced broadcaster and a financial adviser at Enable Me.

You can follow the podcast at iHeartRadio, Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts. New episodes are released every Monday.