Paul Charman: Time wasting is working for me

Plenty dabble in procrastination, some demonstrate the gifting and diligence to turn it into an art form. Photo / iStock

Opinion

Recognition and protection needed for workers who procrastinate

The famous Pareto Principle applies an 80/20 split to most areas of business.

For example, almost 80 per cent of complaints come from 20 per cent of customers; 80 per cent of sales are made by 20 per cent of the staff; 80 per cent of profits are generated from 20 per cent of the clients, and so forth ... But this also applies to time management, well, to mine anyway.

After keeping a careful track of my day with the aid of a notebook, various SatNav tracking devices, an internet log and two hidden GoPro cameras, I've learned that 80 per cent or more of what I accomplish is completed during about 20 per cent (or less) of my time at work.

So what am I doing the rest of the time?

Well, no surprises there.

The data shows a day mostly spent in entertaining banter with colleagues; instant messaging on Facebook, checking emails, sitting in meetings, surfing the net, reading articles online, lengthy lunchbreaks, shopping, eating, drinking coffee, visiting the bathroom, banking and other personal business, making private phone calls, thinking creative thoughts, sharing my views on sport, politics and company policy, going to see people in other parts of the building, catching up on the news and staring into space.

I don't think that's excessive.

Rather, I'd like to suggest a new business paradigm recognising "special" employees like me, because generally we're so vibrant, innovative and fun to have around.

We who are gifted in this way demonstrate the truth of the fact that humans only use 10 per cent of their brains.

Certainly many scientists reject this idea as a myth, but they can't deny that -- at any given moment -- only a small percentage of a human's brain regions will be firing concurrently.

So, if most of the time most of the human brain is taking it easy, effectively waiting its turn to do some work, this principle can apply to a modern office as well.

Achieving most of one's productivity during a small part of one's day should, in my view, be regarded as the natural state of things.

Consider the pride of lions, they who sleep most of the day, till -- animated by a brief surge of energy -- they'll grab a passing antelope. Doesn't that just sum it up.

I've met countless journalists who agree with me on this score, though admittedly most of them work in corporate communications.

But in any case, while science can't back me up on it right this minute, perhaps one day we'll discover attempting to expand productivity into every hour of the working day is dangerous to the health. One feels instinctively that it is.

And what of the achievements and unique contribution made by those of us who ration our powers more sensibly?

Remember junior technician Humphrey Potter -- the lad whose duty it was back in 1713 to manually open and close the valves of the first steam engine.

Humphrey had better things to do so he made the engine "self-acting". Apparently the lad added suitable chords and catches so the engine would open and close its own valves.

I feel Humphrey Potter became a prototype for the elite among modern office workers, for us who can coast all day then get it all done at the last minute.

But I don't know about 80 per cent of the workforce attaining the level of skill this demands. It's more likely to apply to only a few of us who begin with a natural gift, then diligently hone it over many years.

Plenty dabble in procrastination; some of us turn it into an art form.

The time is long overdue for a "Humphrey Potter Syndrome" (HPS) to be recognised.

Us who can so cheerfully innovate, while rejecting the treadmill of endless low-level achievement, should be treated kind of like savants.

It is tasteless to refer to us by the "L" word (lazy) and in all likelihood, also in contravention of various human rights and UN conventions.

Following input from experts, I'm pleased to say creating a special area under the law to recognise and protect such a minority looks feasible.

It would be sensible to ensure our rights are maintained and, one day soon I hope, also unwise to discriminate against us.