A white British man who works on a chicken farm is, like Harry Styles, fully aware of the winning hand life has dealt him. Bill McKay of Lincolnshire, who deals withfeeding fowl and shovelling poop, is humbly going about his low-paid, low-status job acutely conscious of the immense and bountiful privileges the patriarchy has gifted him. He said: “Sometimes the squawking gets you down, but then I remember I’m a caucasian male sexually attracted to women. I’ve won life’s golden ticket. I can’t be concerned about minimum wage when there’s a gender pay gap. When one of the birds that’s still got a beak goes for my eyes, it kind of feels like karma.” (Via The Daily Mash)
Parenting for LOLZ
People doing stupid things for internet fame is a story almost as old as the internet. Herein a TikTok family decides to show off a rarely successful “hack” for getting a child on a theme park attraction they are too small for, i.e. glueing lifts to the soles of the kid’s shoes. The comments quickly pointed out that a) this is dangerous for the kid and b) you’ll get caught and ruin your kid’s experience at the park. The Social Media Parent then tried to explain that the video was just staged for the lols.
Grim, innocuous and puerile stats
1. We collectively receive about 2.4 billion robocalls per month.
2. Less than 10 per cent of Americans do not wear seatbelts and account for 51 per cent of car-related fatalities.
3. Only about 2 per cent of Earth’s population has naturally blonde hair.
4. In 2020, overdose with a synthetic opioid (primarily fentanyl) became the leading cause of death in all Americans ages 18 to 45. Motor vehicle accidents were the former leading cause for this age group.
5. Continents move at the same rate that fingernails grow.
6. The average human farts five to 15 times per day.