Marc Gascoigne. Photo / File
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Dairy farmer Marc Gascoigne struggled with his mental health "on and off" for almost 20 years before he asked for help.
Gascoigne, who runs a successful 150-hectare, 450 cow dairy farm south of Cambridge, was reluctant to discuss his feelings and only his wife knew he was suffering.
However, he was shocked by her suggestion that he take medication to ease his stress levels, Gascoigne told The Country's Jamie Mackay.
"I do remember years and years ago, my wife saying to me, 'maybe you should go and see the doctor and maybe look at some antidepressants'.
"I remember it being like a kick in the guts. I just couldn't believe that she'd suggest something like that. I really didn't think I had a problem and I didn't want to talk about it with anyone."
Now he's keen to lessen the stigma surrounding mental wellbeing and wants other farmers to know that it's OK to need a hand.
"As I've talked about it more I see just how many people it affects and it's pretty common to try and keep it on the down-low, but that's probably the silliest thing you can do."
Using antidepressants is part of Gascoigne's recovery now and he wants others to know that it's a normal part of life.
"There is that stigma attached to antidepressants, you know, I hear so many people saying I don't want to be reliant on taking a pill every day.
"Well the way I look at it - I don't really want to be relying on using toothpaste to brush my teeth every day either - but I'm going to do that.
"It's the same thing to me."
While his medication didn't solve all his problems, it kept him "more level", Gascoigne said.
"I don't have a problem with it at all."
Gascoigne also looked after his wellbeing through exercise and keeping in touch with friends.
Getting active helped him lower his stress levels and clear his head, which helped with decision making.
"It just burns off the cortisol and adrenaline and gets the happy hormones going if you like."
Combining exercise and catching up with friends was a great way to relax as well, he said.
"I'd never usually go to the gym just by myself, but we've got a group of guys - we call ourselves The Average Joes - it's good to get a workout and also have a bit of banter. We always have a coffee afterwards."
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He encouraged other farmers to get involved in social activities such as sports.
"You're killing two birds with one stone - you're getting that physical activity but you're also connecting with other people.
"Connecting is so important for farmers. We spend so much of the day in our own heads, by ourselves, it's isolated ... so the more we can get off-farm and talk to people from different walks of life, the better.
It can be hard to get motivated when under stress, but Gascoigne said it was worth the effort.
"When I was going through my issues all I wanted to do was sit at home on the couch. I didn't want to be involved or talk to anyone - and that's the worse thing you can do.
"You've got to get out there and get off-farm ... the more connection you can have with all sorts of people, the better you're going to be mentally."
Gascoigne now helps others through his work with Farmstrong and as a facilitator for the Rural Support Trust.
Six years ago, after "finally" admitting he had an issue, Gascoigne went to see his GP, who suggested he check out the Farmstrong website.
"A lot of the stuff on the Farmstrong website I've made use of and now I'm happy to be a Farmstrong Ambassador and see if I can help them."
Where to get help:
Farmstrong
Rural Support Trust: 0800 787 254
Lifeline: 0800 543 354 (available 24/7)
Suicide Crisis Helpline: 0508 828 865 (0508 TAUTOKO) (available 24/7)
Youthline: 0800 376 633
Kidsline: 0800 543 754 (available 24/7)
Whatsup: 0800 942 8787 (1pm to 11pm)
Depression helpline: 0800 111 757 (available 24/7)
If it is an emergency and you feel like you or someone else is at risk, call 111.