It was the second time he had been taken into state care after suffering significant physical abuse at the hands of his mother and other relatives for years.
"I lived in fear of my mother. I'm not sure why I was treated so differently [from his siblings] and with such malice.
"I lived in a state of fear and home didn't seem like home at all."
The first time MM had been placed in state care he was aged between 10 and 11 and had been beaten as well as sexually abused by a Pakeha man, at a home on Auckland's Western Springs Rd, who was known to take in unsettled or semi-abandoned boys.
"I can still feel his moustache squash around the area of my face around my mouth."
MM could still remember the smell of the man's breath and hearing his heavy breathing over him as he tried to sodomise him.
"It hurt but he failed, he failed to penetrate me."
He detailed how other boys living at the house, which he described as a "haven of sexual abuse and violence", had also attempted to rape him.
After returning to live with his mother, MM was asked if he had been abused while watching the news of the man's arrest.
"When I answered her, yes, that he had - lo and behold I got a hiding. I got a hiding and called stupid."
It was that beating which led MM to run away and wind up at Owairaka, where he was physically and verbally abused by staff and other residents.
MM tried to run away, after being assaulted by another boy who he recognised as someone who sexually abused him at the house on Western Springs Rd, but was caught and returned to the secure unit.
His assailant, who also ended up in "secure", tormented him by yelling out threats.
"It was like I was being tortured to hear him calling out threats to me."
During his stay MM said he never went to school and there was no acknowledgement of his Māori heritage unless it was used in derogatory terms.
MM was then moved from foster home to foster home before returning to Owairaka and then being sent to Oakley Hospital by the Children's Court in 1973 while a psychological report was prepared for two assault charges he faced.
He was then sent to Waikeria Borstal where the abuse continued.
After being wrongfully accused of taking part in a fight with staff, MM wound up with four convictions for assault causing grievous bodily harm which still have an impact on his dealings with the justice system today.
After MM received a beating from his partner's father not long after they had had their first child, he fell in with gangs while searching for a connection.
"It was somewhere I was made to feel like I was somebody."
MM said he relished the gang lifestyle of violence, drinking and taking drugs.
"It [violence] was seen to give a person some recognition, some mana."
However, he didn't consider, at the time, the effect it would have on a mind that was already disturbed by horrible abuse.
Now in his 60s and having spent most of his life incarcerated, MM said he hadn't seen his children or mokopuna for 20 years.
"It makes me feel like I have failed them as a father."
MM said he still lives in a state of hypersensitivity to any form of abuse, threats or unfairness.
Fuelled by a desire to change, MM said reconnecting with his whakapapa had helped him make sense of his life and enabled him to assist others in a similar situation.
He thanked the Commission for being able to share his story in the hope it would result in better processes and procedures being put in place.
MM said more people at a high level needed a better understanding of Māori ways to help guide Māori back to a pathway of healing and understanding.
