It's been 16 years, but Ernie* still remembers his last drink.
It was the drinking session that tipped him over the edge and made him realise he needed help.
Ernie was 24 years old and celebrating his first day on the job with his boss.
But one jug of beer and his memory
goes. The rest of the night is a black hole. He remembers being at a garage party at 2am on a Tuesday morning, drinking, smoking and talking to someone who was deaf. He was due at work at seven.
It was lucky he didn't have a car at the time, he says, otherwise he would've driven home.
Ernie's story is familiar to many alcoholics. Throughout eight years of binge drinking, Ernie was constantly lying and deceiving those closest to him. He hid his drinking, preferring to drink alone, and abstained when he knew it would be inappropriate to get sloshed.
It's not that Ernie was drinking every day. It was more once he started he couldn't stop.
He said drinking was a hobby and an escape mechanism. ``When I first started drinking I felt really comfortable in my own skin. It really pushed my button. It was my coping mechanism to handle stresses, anxieties and disappointments of life.''
But drink made him irresponsible, unreliable and hurt friends and family. He had suicidal thoughts. He crashed his car driving drunk. ``I was becoming withdrawn. I was drinking at home, work, the pub, wherever. I could've moved to Antarctica and still found something to drink.
``It felt like other people were travelling and settling down and I was more interested in drinking.''
Friends recommended Alcoholics Anonymous. He didn't feel like he fitted the ``type'', visualising alcoholics in trench coats and living under bridges. But then, the others he met at AA didn't fit the type either.
Ernie listened to their stories. Although other members were different from him, they spoke a common language. Those meetings turned his life around, he says.
``It was about facing life and fronting up to the responsibility of my life. It's the best thing I've ever done. It was the beginning of a wonderful life.''
Ernie has been sober since and goes to meetings once a week. He's finally living the life he thought happened to only those around him.
``[Joining AA] is the best thing I've ever done. I really enjoy being sober. I'm happily married, I'm a father. I don't know how I had the time to drink.''
* Name has been changed
It's been 16 years, but Ernie* still remembers his last drink.
It was the drinking session that tipped him over the edge and made him realise he needed help.
Ernie was 24 years old and celebrating his first day on the job with his boss.
But one jug of beer and his memory
AdvertisementAdvertise with NZME.