Take a leap out of your comfort zone

Kristen Hamling Photo/File

The Project for Happiness website recently posted a brilliant new acronym for FEAR - Forget Everything And Run, or if you have a growth mindset, explained shortly, Face Everything And Rise.

Fear often stops us from taking action. With the safety of our comfort zone alluring us into inertia, we miss out on building our strengths, feeling empowered by overcoming obstacles and having our lives enriched by new experiences.

Have you ever wondered why some people can step outside their comfort zone with ease, constantly trying new things, taking failure in their stride and always seeking new challenges?

One reason, according to Carol Dweck, is in how people approach obstacles, challenges and setbacks - with a fixed or growth mindset.

A person with a fixed mindset believes that talents, abilities and intelligence are fixed, you have a certain amount and that is that. A person with a fixed mindset avoids challenges for fear of failure. They prefer to stick to activities that they are good at, ones that confirm that they are smart and capable. But this is very restrictive in life and prevents ongoing success. Such people will tend to accept situations as they are, versus learning, practising and working to make things better.

On the other hand a person with a growth mindset believes that talents, abilities and intelligence can be developed with practice, effort and work. They do not accept status quo, but believe that anyone can achieve better results if they put the work in. They see failure as part of a learning process rather than ineptitude.

Research has shown that people can grow their intelligence. Studies in neuroplasticity show that fundamental aspects of intelligence can be enhanced through learning. Every time you push out of your comfort zone and learn something new your brain develops new connections and you become smarter.

The old adage "use it or lose it" applies to a growth mindset. I imagine this is why health practitioners encourage people throughout their lives to keep learning and trying new things as a way of slowing the onset off dementia.

If you want to reach your potential, then work towards a growth mindset. Face challenges and work through obstacles, seeing them as opportunities for growth and learning. Consider effort and learning as the reward in itself, rather than the end outcome. Don't fear failure, it is the pathway to learning. Learn from criticism by putting negative emotions to the side whilst you consider if there is any merit to the criticism.

People with a growth mindset tend to cope better with failure as they consider it as a learning opportunity. Being perfect is boring. There is nothing to be gained from sticking to things that you are good at and avoiding failure. Working through the tough aspects of life is where all the good stuff comes from.

I firmly believe in growth mindset and I have been coaching my family towards this. One way to do this with your kids is through a concept such as process praise. This involves praising your child's efforts rather than praising their abilities. Praising for effort sends the message that a child can improve their performance and intelligence through hard work and persistence. Saying things like "you worked hard on that, I am so proud of you" is more likely to result in a growth mindset than praising ability (eg, "clever boy, you are so smart"). My son knows that "practice, practice, practice" is what is going to get him to where he wants to go, whether it is in reading, skiing or on the scooter.