Wyn Drabble: A word or two about our language

Wyn Drabble says English is confusing and ever-changing. Photo / NZME

A reader has sent me a letter about confusion over word meanings. He asked if I could throw light on a conversation he recently had with his daughter-in-law. It went like this:

Daughter: Thanks for saving the supermarket coupons for me. I am now the proud owner of a new casserole dish.

Father: You're welcome. I can't wait to sample the spoils.

Daughter: I didn't realise my cooking was so bad that you think I spoil everything.

The reader – I hope he doesn't mind if I call him Read for short – asked if this was a generational thing.

Well, Read, it probably is because spoil in that sense doesn't seem to be used much anymore. I tend to associate it with war (where looters make off with their spoils). For that sense you could also say booty but that would sound just as quaint.

It's evidence that the English language is confusing and ever-changing. Look at Read's first piece of dialogue above. "You're" isn't the only word that sounds like that. Consider "your" (a common choice in this regard), "yore" or "yaw".

And my use of "anymore" a little earlier is also fraught with confusion. There is also "any more" but that's slightly different. ("No thanks, I don't want any more tea.") As an adverb relating to time, it is one word. Confusing? Of course it is.

Another reader once pulled me up for using "reoccur" instead of "recur" but it was what I meant. "Reoccur" means to happen once again whereas "recur" means to keep happening again. A subtle difference but a difference nonetheless.

I'm sure you don't need more evidence of confusing features of English but I'm going to give them to you anyway.

English has plenty of homonyms (words that are spelled and pronounced the same but have different meanings): "hail" is ice falling from the sky and also a method of catching a taxi; "gross" can mean particularly unpleasant or it can simply mean 144; "change" can mean alter or it can mean money given back after a purchase.

Then there are the homophones (words that sound the same but are spelled differently and have different meanings): symbol/cymbal; crews/cruise; their/there/they're; to/too/two. These examples and many others will easily confuse the unwary and learners of English as a second language.

Then, to really confuse matters, along come homographs, which have the same spelling but different sound and meaning (wound, minute, tear, for example). How dare they.

Wyn Drabble.

The word "ghoti" was "invented in the 1800s to show the idiosyncrasies of our language. If you pronounce the "gh" as in enough, the "o" as in women and the "ti" as in nation, the pronunciation of ghoti is fish. Lol.

And what about English spelling rules, which can be risibly irregular? "I" before "e" except after "c" but not always. Weird.

I'm lucky that I don't have enough space left to explore the vagaries of grammar. It means I don't have time to explain why the "me" is correct in "My wife and I appreciate your hospitality so please accept this gift from my wife and me".

With the difficulties of English, it's a wonder there are not more incidents in the maritime and aeronautical worlds, given that English is the official language of both.

So, let's go back to Read waiting for his spoils. He could have said, "I can't wait to taste what you cook in it", but that does sound rather clumsy. No time for debate anyway because Read closed his letter with the perfect ending for me to steal:

"Any help would be appreciated but in the meantime I must rush off and spoil the grandchildren."

• Wyn Drabble is a teacher of English, a writer, musician and public speaker.