STAROS Grassroots Hawke's Bay event helps communities through suicide prevention, suicide aftermath

Guest Speaker HDC councillor Peleti Oli stood up and spoke about the impact suicide and mental health issues have personally had on him, and what helped him get through it. Photo / Ian Cooper

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Mental health, well-being and suicide are things most people struggle to understand.

The Grassroots event - an active, practical and community-based approach to all things mental health and suicide awareness - was started to help communities through suicide prevention and suicide aftermath.

Over the weekend Grassroots Hawke's Bay 2022 was held at Taruna College, where attendees heard how suicide can affect others.

STAROS co-founder Warren Brown explained he runs events like Grassroots to help others struggling with losing loved ones to suicide.

In 2012 Brown lost his 25-year-old son Stuart to suicide, and at the time there was nothing in Hawke's Bay to support people affected by suicide.

Through STAROS, Brown organises speakers to talk to the community about their experiences with the aftermath of losing someone to suicide.

Throughout the five-hour event Hawke's Bay speakers spoke of how living with the effects of suicide can alter how it is perceived.

STAROS co-founder Warren Brown introducing guest speakers at the Grassroots Hawke's Bay 2022 event at Taruna College Havelock North. Photo / Ian Cooper

A big push behind Grassroots was to normalise mental health conversations and to help people learn how to express and share challenging topics and life events in a safe environment.

Hastings District Councillor and Flaxmere barber Peleti Oli was one of three inspirational speakers headlining the event.

Councillor Oli explained the event was purely about the healing journey.

"Whoever turned up, was supposed to be there," he said.

To Oli, it didn't matter if there were 1000 people or just one person in attendance.

"People attended the event for their own reasons, whether to find answers, gain knowledge, or receive advice."

Oli lost his younger brother Someh Oli to suicide, which triggered Oli himself into a spiral of depression, anxiety, and self-destructive behaviour.

"Hitting rock bottom for me taught me that if I didn't turn my brother's death into a lesson learned, he would have died in vain," Oli said.

The councillor says he now tries to take any opportunity to raise awareness and speak about his life to help others understand that those that die by suicide don't really want to die, they just want the pain to stop.

Oli explained that he learned a lot about why people commit suicide from hearing Ron Mokaraka share his inspiring life journey through his workshop called "Shot Bro".

Mokaraka also attended the Grassroots event, as his workshop Shot bro is another event run by STAROS.

Events like Grassroots are significant to the Hastings community because we are losing many lives to suicide, said Oli.

The councillor believes Hastings needs to have more mental health workshops and build safe spaces to allow those who need to reach out to feel that what they are going through is normal.

"We need to take the stigma and stereotypes away from the word suicide because it's our families that have to deal with loss," he said.

The STAROS workshops share tools for identifying signs and learning ways to help our loved ones who may be struggling.

"If there is one thing our community should know," Oli said, "it is that it's ok to have bad days, that we can find ways to open up and share the pain that we are feeling."