Teilah Ferguson makes a break for Hurricanes Poua against Chiefs Manawa, in March. Photo / SmartFrame
Teilah Ferguson had made thousands of tackles before picking up a rugby ball for the first time as a young kid in Napier with big dreams.
But this time for the Hurricanes Poua and Hawke’s Bay Tui midfielder, the aftermath of a routine tackle felt very different.
Ferguson was playing a club game at Elwood Park in Hastings in May, she went in for a tackle and a boot flipped up and went straight into her eye. When the stud hit her eye she knew instantly it was bad.
She fell to the ground, looked up and all she could see out of her left eye was a wall of red – then pitch black. Then nothing.
It was early in the season and the 25-year-old had only recently returned from a near career-ending herniated disc injury.
She recalls the moment she was walking to the car with her mum to head to the hospital.
“I was trying to do the math, like ‘OK, I’ve got a concussion, it should be a three-week stand down’,” Ferguson said. “I should be good for the playoffs, it should be okay. Then a whole tsunami of emotions came and all of a sudden I just dropped to the ground and started crying and crying.”
“Even to this day I still can’t put my finger on what exactly I was crying about. I think it was just a range of emotions cause at that point I didn’t know I was blind. Something came over me and I was crying and eventually got myself back up and headed to the hospital.”
Her eye was swollen and the pain had gotten worse at the hospital. Ferguson was told she’d have to wait until later that evening or the next morning to have surgery. But the pain was excruciating, and she wasn’t sure if she could wait.
“It felt like having a knife go through your eye to the back of your brain and slowly turning. The pressure and sharpness of it was unbearable,” Ferguson said.
What was supposed to be a two-hour operation, turned into four-and-a-half hours. Her mum Julie was there waiting for her when she finally emerged from surgery at 2am.
The next morning she found out her fate.
“The nurses and doctors have that look before they give bad news, avoiding eye contact and giving a soft glare when they look at you – and I could just tell that it wasn’t good news.”
Ferguson was told that there was no chance of her eyesight returning with doctors finding the condition of her eye to be worse than they had originally thought. She was in disbelief and felt like her world came crumbling down.
It had been an emotional 24 hours, but this time when she had realised what had happened, there were no tears. A day later, Ferguson announced her retirement from rugby.
Eleven months before the injury, her mother Julie had been diagnosed with breast cancer. Seeing her mum stay strong through her own health journey inspired Ferguson.
Julie represented New Zealand in rugby, rugby league and touch rugby. She also played alongside Ferguson for the Hawke’s Bay Tui in the Farah Palmer Cup.
“She’s one of my biggest inspirations as to why I played rugby because she represented the country,” Ferguson said.
“Throughout my whole childhood she was always faster and stronger than me and on the rugby field she was a machine.”
Since Julie’s diagnosis, she has faced surgery, chemotherapy, radiation and hormone therapy with incredible strength.
“She’s now nearing the end of her treatment, looking and feeling fantastic. Things are looking very positive. This journey has taught us many lessons, and we’ve found strength in each other every step of the way,” Ferguson said.
“I owe a lot of my own thinking and how I’ve handled this eye injury to her. When it happened I thought to myself I’ve just got to keep going because that’s what she did.”
Not long after the accident, Ferguson started posting on Tik Tok, sharing her story and her daily challenges with her new normal.
She has been flooded with messages from many people who have experienced the same thing as her, including a girl who lost her eye in a golf injury. Ferguson met up with her in person and said it was cool to share their relatable stories.
Many admire the way Ferguson has responded to the injury and her resilience and positive outlook on life.
“I think it kind of shocked me. I remember five days after the injury, I was telling my family I think I’m gonna make a video on things I’ve noticed have changed. I made the video and I remember sitting there wondering should I post it?
“I thought ‘no one actually cares, this is a weird video’ and then it kind of blew up and I kept sharing. Seeing how many people were keen to learn and jump on the journey made me post more.
“I just wanted to remove any kind of stigma and I really enjoy posting, it’s a healing process in itself.
“I’ve had to overcome a lot of obstacles throughout life so whatever happens I just know that I can overcome it. I always say that everything is ‘workoutable’,” Ferguson said.
Ferguson has had to sit her driver’s licence test again and is feeling great getting her independence back.
Despite not being able to play rugby any more, she is still involved in the sport as a female rugby development activator for Hawke’s Bay Rugby Union.
It’s a job she’s passionate about, looking after all girls rugby from kindergarten right up to the women’s space.
She has helped bridge the gap for girls’ rugby between intermediate and high school, and this year started the under-14s competition with seven girls teams competing.
Ferguson also does contract work for Ignite nutrition and owns Napier’s first Sauna Project with her dad Faryn and brother Trey Ferguson.
They started the venture in February 2024, expanding the already established franchise which has portable saunas scattered at different spots around the country.
Ferguson stays active at CrossFit Napier and likes to cook in her spare time, putting her Food Science and Psychology degree from the University of Otago to good use.
If she’s not working or at the gym, she’s playing the piano, guitar or cello and making music in a homemade recording studio.
Ferguson has been able to get through this new season of her life by focusing on the things she can control.
“I’ve definitely adapted and I feel like my peripheral has gotten a bit wider, especially in familiar environments you see me trying to piece together what could be there.
“At times, I still bump into things and get a bruised hip or shoulders because I didn’t see something but we’re good and I’ve gotten used to it.”
Before the injury, Ferguson had a few goals in mind.
“I didn’t get much game time in the Hurricanes but we trained so much that when I went back to club rugby I was having fun and expressing myself.
“I still had aspirations to make either the Black Ferns or my goal was to go over to Australia at the end of the year and give rugby league a go. But obviously since the injury I’ve had to divert and pivot.
“Funnily enough it has been very eye-opening and I’ve actually quite enjoyed being able to give time to things that I otherwise have neglected.”
Ferguson has just bought a house and wants to continue learning and growing, becoming her own boss.
“I hope that I am inspiring others not to sweat the small stuff and know that you can get through anything. There’s no obstacle that someone else hasn’t been able to overcome.”
This story was originally published at Newsroom.co.nz and is republished with permission.