OPINION
Just the news we all needed after months of doom and gloom about the horribly expensive cost of simply being alive: the cost of dying is also going up.
Yes, the curse of inflation and other sinister economic forces dogging us in life are also following us into the afterlife, as councils across the country put up their fees and charges.
In Tauranga, the rise in cemetery and crematorium fees this year was 40 per cent, in Rotorua it was 8 per cent. In both cities, the cost of a traditional burial runs into the thousands while cremation costs hundreds.
There are ways to cut costs - coffin clubs, for example, allow people to add some DIY.
If you want to be cremated but do not want to pay for it, you can try to have your body donated to science.
New Zealand's two medical schools, the University of Auckland and the University of Otago, accept body donations that fit certain criteria.
The biggest catch is you may not be able to be present for your own funeral, given the need for swift removal of the body for embalming and delivery to the university.
Once your body is done being studied - Auckland University estimates one to three years, Otago says it's usually at least 18 months - you'll be cremated and the ashes either scattered or returned to your family.
Fair warning: the schools can keep body parts for further study.
If cremation is off the table, a growing number of councils offer natural burials.
Described as an environmentally friendly option, the unembalmed body is enclosed in natural fibres - say a shroud or cardboard casket - and buried in a shallow grave, with a tree then planted on top.
Ultimately, the body returns to the earth and the tree becomes part of a memorial forest.
Whakatāne District Council, for example, charges $1000 for this (more on weekends). It has a list of a dozen varieties of native trees to choose from - a leguminous kōwhai or a leathery-leafed houhere? Compost is included.
If feeding a tree is not your speed, how about becoming fish food?
Burial at sea is legal in New Zealand. You may not, however, simply roll the family fisherman overboard at his secret spot.
The process is regulated, in part because it is considered culturally inappropriate by some Māori.
The approved path involves the body being sewn securely into a shroud or placed into a weighted coffin or container and taken via boat or helicopter to one of five areas authorised for burials at sea, where the remains will be sunk to the sea floor.
According to guidance by the Environmental Protection Authority, fees associated with this in 2018 were $200 to $300.
Sounds like a bargain.