KAPAI: Marae most fertile garden for God's flowers

Sunflowers until now have always reminded me of big beaming faces full of summer smiles and lazy days lounging around in the afternoon delight of a much loved garden. There is something about a big bright yellow sunflower that sways softly and safely in the same breath of wind, probably because no one or no thing would ever want to hurt something so beautiful.
When I see the image of little three-year-old Nia Glassie in her bright yellow summer sombrero I see a sunflower that could have been but now will sadly join the other fallen flowers of family abuse.
Just like her carnation cousins the Kahui twins and the frail little flower called Lilly Bing, the smiling little sunflower with the big eyebrows will follow her floral friends back to God's garden where no one can ever hurt them again.
There have been many arrows fired from the bow of blame this past week when it comes to finding answers to what went wrong in the whare of Nia Glassie. Many fingers have been pointed at Maoridom and many Maori have been asking exactly the same questions as the rest of Aotearoa as to how and why abuse has cast such a dark cloud.
Sometimes the simple sentence of a founding father of peace can offer a solution, so when I turned to the teachings of my mentor the Dalai Lama his answer said it all. When he was asked how do we stop abuse and violence he smiled and said, "One random act of kindness at a time."
Maybe we can all find some sanity in the senseless cruelty by living these wise words day in, day out.
For my two bobs' worth I see many or most answer for Maori in their marae. We have 1050 marae in this country that connect Maori whanau and family to a support system that could never be duplicated with all of the money in the putea (budget) of governing health authorities.
If we look at the highlighted areas of concern for Maori such as abuse, violence, addiction and poor health and where they happen, we see a pattern emerging of little or no connection to their hapu, iwi and most importantly their marae. The marae is a place to stand, to learn and to be loved under a korowai (cloak) of awhi from whanau who care and understand the issues.
There is no equal in any hospital, institution or waiting room of well-meaning minders of other people's problems.
The challenge for health authorities is to learn how to engage Maori in their own environment in a language they can all understand. Too often we see research by clinicians and academics highlighting the problems of Maori heath but very few of their findings point resources in the right direction to wharenui flax level on the marae. Until we can start funnelling our funding in a direction that starts putting together packages of teaching in bite-sized, understandable korero, very little will change.
There are many wise heads in and around a marae and many eyes and ears that can see a situation a long way before it gets out of hand. Many Maori have drifted from their marae and are not only lost in translation but are disconnected from their whanau support system. They make poor choices that turn into very bad results.
It has been said before and it needs saying again. If we put more resources into our marae and our sporting organisations and less into finding out what we already know then we will work out where the flowers have all gone and how we get them back to growing in a garden where they belong. As always there is a song that says it all.
Where have all the flowers gone, long time passing, where have all the flowers gone _ long time ago. Where have all the flowers gone, gone to graveyards every one, when will we ever learn _ when will we ever learn.
When will we learn? Today's a good day to start if my mate Mr Lama's right about random acts of kindness. Let's hope the loss of little Nia stands for something.
Haere, haere, haere little yellow sunflower. Fly home safely on your starship waka, to God's garden where you can shine on for ever.
Pai marire tommy@indigenius.org