A shared love of music and good company sparked a relationship between Mary Shapley residents Pamela Dewar and George Sanderson, who tied the knot late last month. Photo / Supplied / Whakatāne Beacon
-Troy Baker, Whakatāne Beacon
For the first time in the history of Whakatāne’s Mary Shapley Rest Home, two of its residents have met, mingled, fallen in love and are now married.
For Pamela Dewar and George Sanderson, both in their 80s, it wasn’t love at first sight, but a shared love of music and good company that sparked their relationship.
Dewar was born in North Wales and moved to New Zealand at the age of 9.
Her father, Sam Jackson, was an army man who had spent time in the United States, giving him a taste for life overseas.
When he returned, he told his wife, Beth, all about it and decided the family would emigrate. Their options were Canada, Australia or New Zealand – and they chose New Zealand.
After seven years in the army, Jackson left to “spread his wings”, becoming the town clerk of Featherston.
The family later moved to Taupō, where he worked for the Ministry of Works’ geothermal division as an accountant.
It was there, at the age of 15, that Dewar landed her first job at Taupō Press and Stationers, which later became the Taupō Times.
“I was a typist at school, and my job was as a typesetter, preparing the letters ready for print. After that, I tried my hand at nursing in Rotorua,” she said.
“I served for three years but never sat the final exam because I couldn’t handle the surgical side and would always faint.
“In the end, the surgeon shouted for someone to ‘get that girl out of here and don’t let her back in’.”
Dewar remained in the nursing industry and built a life for herself in Auckland.
At 21, she met her husband and married a year later. After moving to Kawerau and later losing her husband, she felt the need to re-evaluate her situation.
After searching for a suitable retirement home, she settled on Mary Shapley and made the move at the age of 80, finding the security and independence she needed.
“When I arrived at Mary Shapley, I wasn’t looking for anyone, but we met the Friday after I arrived.
“We have an event called Friendly Forum where we chat and socialise.
“When I introduced myself and said I enjoyed singing, it immediately got George’s attention.
“Within a week, unbeknown to me, George had made up his mind that he was going to marry me,” she said.
Music has always been part of her life. Growing up in Wales, both her parents sang and she performed in church choirs and community groups.
Later in Kawerau, she worked at New World for 15 years, often singing from 4am until the shop opened at 8am.
Now, she and George sing together regularly.
Sanderson, the youngest of 18 children, arrived in New Zealand from England in 1972 with his wife and four children. They believed their family could have a better life here and he has never regretted the move.
His first job was farming in Edgecumbe, an experience he did not enjoy.
He later moved to Tāneatua, where he worked for 12 years painting and decorating, a trade he had previously worked in while in the United Kingdom.
When he first arrived in New Zealand there was more demand for farmers than painters, so he retrained before eventually returning to his original trade.
Sanderson’s wife later left the marriage. He retired at 61, but just one month later suffered a stroke while on holiday with siblings in the north, resulting in five months in hospital and four years out of work.
After living independently on Beach St for 21 years, Sanderson moved into Mary Shapley, where he met Dewar.
Performance had long been part of his life, too. Back in the UK, his mother put him on stage for the first time at the age of 5.
“I wasn’t nervous. I sang through school and joined a band. When I was 18, we went to France for a weekend and ended up touring and even recording a few songs.
“I was 21 when my mother called and told me to come home and get a real job,” Sanderson said.
He later worked picking fruit, a job he enjoyed, before finding employment at a club taking coats at the door, where he met well-known comedians including Stephen Fry and Spike Milligan.
“My father couldn’t believe I was making more money than him,” he said.
When Sanderson proposed, Dewar admits there was a two-minute silence before she said yes. It was not a decision she took lightly.
“He stood up on January 21 during Friday Forum in front of 38 people and told everyone to be quiet.
“He announced, Pamela and I are getting married. Apparently, everyone had already guessed it was going to happen.
“We are both very independent, but we complement each other,” Dewar said.
The couple finally tied the knot on January 28, at the Baptist Church on Keepa Rd with family and friends in attendance.
A reception was held back at Mary Shapley during happy hour so they could celebrate with what they describe as their new family.
The newlyweds plan to move in together if a twin unit becomes available, but in the meantime, they are content to just enjoy each other’s company.