The best medicine

TIGHT BOND: Megan Collier-Baker, left, and her mother Pam Collier-Baker, who is a breast cancer patient and who will be one of the faces of the Pink Walk. PHOTO/STEPHEN PARKER 191014SP5

Cancer isn't normally much of a laughing matter - but don't tell that to Pam Collier-Baker. As she tells Rebecca Malcolm, a positive attitude is what has got her through.

Pam Collier-Baker knows she may always have the tag as a "breast cancer survivor" - but pity is the last thing she wants.

In the time following the discovery of a lump in her breast last July, she's never felt sick. Even through chemotherapy and radiation she's always felt well - something which perhaps made the cancer diagnosis that wee bit harder to understand.

And while it's a diagnosis that will always be with her, Pam says she's speaking out as much to show that there is life after cancer as anything else.

It's no longer the death sentence it might have been years ago. And today, Pam is as full of life as ever.

She's even gracing posters around the city as one of the poster girls for this year's Pink Walk to raise money and awareness for the Rotorua Breast Cancer Trust, which is taking place on Wednesday.

Pink Walk

The Rotorua woman was diagnosed with breast cancer last year. She found a lump in her breast while showering, but even then she didn't think too much of it.

A few years before she'd found a lump in her other breast which turned out to be a cyst, and she had no reason to think this time would be any different.

"When they first said [it was cancer] I though 'oh s**t' but then I moved into planning mode."

Humour key to survival

Aside from having her tonsils out at 21, the bubbly mum of three reckons she has hardly even taken a Panadol since.

"That was the sum total of my illness. Boy did I go to the top shelf pretty quick."

After the lump was diagnosed as cancer, Pam was given a number of options including having the lump removed.

"For me, a lumpectomy was not ever going to be good enough."

She didn't want to live with the constant worry of "what if they didn't get it all" so opted for the more radical removal and tram flap procedure - where fat from her stomach was removed to fill her breast after the mastectomy.

It's with a hearty chuckle that she announces that getting a flat stomach has to be the bonus of cancer, and admits her somewhat black humour has been a key to surviving the experience.

"I didn't want to go looking over my shoulder. The tummy tuck was a huge bonus after three children."

While the breast surgery didn't worry her - "I was never a girly-girl" - Pam admits she was "totally gutted" after being told post-surgery that she needed chemotherapy.

"I was so sure that because it wasn't in my lymph nodes I wouldn't have to go down that path."

But six months of chemotherapy and three weeks of radiation later, her oncologist described her as "disgustingly healthy".

"He told me he didn't want to see me again."

Positive attitude

Pam was told there was a 94 per cent chance the treatment had got rid of the cancer.

"They are pretty good odds."

She says the family dealt with her ordeal in different ways.

Husband David threw his support behind her, and daughter Megan became a rock, heading along to every appointment with her mum.

It was the boys - particularly her youngest son Bradley - who did it toughest, Pam says.

She was worried her eldest, living overseas, would think because she had cancer he had to upend his life and come home.

"My biggest fear was that he thought because it was cancer he had to jump on a plane and come home. That would have devastated me."

Her youngest was just 17 at the time and Pam says it was difficult for him to know just where he fitted into the scheme of things.

"Because it was breasts, and mum, he didn't ask a lot."

He copped a bit of flak for not attending appointments with his mum, something Pam says was hard.

"Boys have to be handled very carefully. Dads go protective, the girls get into helpful mode. It's quite sad, I think he suffered more than I did."

Daughter's support

It's a desire to see more support out there for the families - the children and the husbands - that has prompted Megan to get involved with the Rotorua Breast Cancer Trust as one of the trustees.

"I've been though it with mum, I'd like to be able to pass that knowledge on."

Megan says while her mum's cancer diagnosis was a shock, there was never any doubt she'd support her mum every step of the way attending every appointment and even taking five weeks off work to care for her mum following the surgery.

"When mum told me my world came tumbling down. There has never been anything wrong with mum ... ever."

She took on the role of providing stability in the family and being there for her brothers and father.

"There were lots of tears but I think positive thinking goes a long way."

She believes the experience has brought the pair closer together - especially the time following surgery where Megan was her mum's carer.

And then came the experiences Megan didn't necessarily expect - like heading out wig shopping together.

"I learned that she is a lot stronger than I thought."

Now, Megan hopes through her role as a trustee she can make the experience easier for other children.

"I'd tell them to stay positive and that each treatment is a step closer to having your mum get rid of cancer."

Pink Walk schedule

Pink Walk festivities start from 5pm Wednesday at the Village Green with food, drink and entertainment on site before the walk begins at 6pm.
The walk is $5 for those over 12, with kids invited to give a koha.
People can register on the night, online at rotoruabreastcancertrust.co.nz or at ASB on the corner of Tutanekai and Pukuatua Sts or Aroha Mai Cancer Support Services in Haupapa St.