Over the past month or so, I have been tremendously encouraged to see a growing sense of connectedness between people in our community.
I shouldn't be surprised as "a sense of community", or whanaungatanga as it is known in Maoridom, is deeply ingrained in the DNA of the Rotorua community.
Social scientists describe sense of community as a sense of belonging, a feeling that members matter to one another and to the group - and a shared belief that needs will be met through their commitment to one another.
They also say community is built through four components. This week, I want to look at the first of those four pillars - "membership". Community membership is about having a sense of belonging. Members of a healthy community feel safe. But to make a community safe, there must be clearly defined boundaries. In other words, clear expectations about what is okay, and what is not.
Some people resist boundaries - for all sorts of reasons. But the reality is that without good boundaries, you end up with chaos. The trick is to strike the right balance between personal freedom and collective responsibility. Healthy boundaries keep people safe.
When our children were toddlers, I was introduced to something called the 3 Ps - precepts, principles and people.
Precept is a very old-fashioned word for rules. One of our family rules was "hand on the car". All of our children knew that whenever they got out of a car they had to place one of their hands on the side of it.
We had this rule because toddlers don't understand the principle of "safety". Hand on the car stopped them from running into the traffic and getting run over.
So behind that rule was the principle of safety; and behind the principle were people - my wife and I.
People who loved those children enough to put rules in place to keep them safe.
Rules, or boundaries are necessary. They are part of the mix that is required to build a healthy and safe community. Good boundaries make people feel safe and respected, creating an environment in which trust and safe relationships can be nurtured.
Do you have good boundaries in place? If not, reach out for help. There are plenty of caring people in our community who are committed to a vision of whanaungatanga. If you want to be put in touch with someone, give me a call.
-Inspector Bruce Horne is the Rotorua police area commander