Mark McTamney fell in love with Japan. PHOTO/STEPHEN PARKER
Mark McTamney's been married four times - to the same woman. He's not a qualified teacher but runs an English language school within the shadow of Mt Fuji - and when he's not on site he's overseeing operations by Skype from his Rotorua dining table.
He's an avid cricketer, working with the ICC to introduce the Japanese to the mysteries of willow and wickets and he's one hell of a good storyteller.
Anecdotes by the pantechnicon-load fall from his lips and if he hasn't kissed the Blarney Stone he darn well should have; he's got all the charm and wit of the Irish and with a surname like McTamney what else would we expect?
Our opening paragraphs contain clues about this Mark McTamney we're reintroducing to his home town, but there's still a heap of fleshing out to do.
Being a John Paul College foundation pupil seems a logical launch pad and entree into his seemingly bottomless well of quotable quotes.
"I was there at the change-over from Edmund Rice, suddenly in a co-ed situation, a bloke with a lot of bravado around girls."
Graduating from Waikato University with a Bachelor of Management Studies, he was convinced he'd be the Bill Gates of New Zealand. "Instead, I got this mind-numbing job as a Farmers purchasing officer ordering in lounge suites ... wow, welcome to the corporate world."
Catching up with a varsity friend at his graduation "hoolie" his life changed tack.
"We were comparing graduation presents, I got a stereo, my mate Shelley Hughes who had a degree in Japanese studies was given a one-way ticket to Japan but didn't want to travel alone, in a moment of madness I said I'd go, I knew nothing about Japan, couldn't speak the language."
The long and short of it is that Shelley was home within three months, until now Mark's hardly left since his 1995 arrival.
"I fell in love with this foreign country, met this Aussie dude, Glenn Carter, at a barbecue, he asked if I played cricket, I said I'd played for Arawa as a little fella but was never any good. He said 'come and play in the Fuji Cricket Club and by the way I'm opening an English language school, you can be a teacher'. I was totally unqualified, didn't know the base language, but he said I'd be fine, he'd be downstairs running a bar."
After fumbling about with flash cards in a class of 7- and 8-year-olds Mark took his guitar into the classroom. "I could only play three chords but the kids thought it was cool."
Cricket became his release valve; he and Glenn approached the local council for a cricket ground.
"We had to show them videos of what cricket was; they said 'you can play at the baseball park' but wouldn't let us put in a wicket . . . one night a concrete one mysteriously appeared, we had great times there."
Three years on Mark was ready to come home; "I'd had a lot of fun but it was time to be mature."
Fate intervened, he was stopped in the street by the American owner of The English Bug Academy, saying he desperately needed a manager for three years, Mark was in.
In 1999 "or was it 2000?" he met his now wife Sayaka, an English teacher in a neighbouring city.
After three years at the academy she suggested they return to New Zealand.
Mark worked as Cobb & Co's operations manager, "the usual McTamney bulls**t got me through".
Eighteen months on The English Bug's owner suggested Mark buy him out - the idea appealed but he needed a spousal visa.
That's when he married Sayaka for the first time. "A [Catholic] priest friend of mine in Cambridge did the deed, no one knew."
Back in Japan the marriage was officially recognised with a civil ceremony. With the school up and running "Sayaka was doing the admin, me teaching despite my business degree," they returned to Rotorua for a "proper wedding at St Mary's ... then there was another in Japan for Sayaka's family and friends who couldn't come to New Zealand, don't ask me to remember four wedding anniversaries."
From the school's original 84 pupils, the McTamneys' roll's now 300; they built new premises in 2009. "Mt Fuji's right outside the window."
Mark became involved in the Japan Cricket Association. "We invited the ICC to come and see that Japan could be a cricketing country, we had about 2000 players. We'd made this ground out of swampland, the ICC was blown away. It's the second I've helped establish but I'm hopeless in the garden."
In 2003 Japan staged its first ICC-sanctioned tournament playing Tonga, Fiji and Indonesia. Mark coached the Japanese team.
More recently the McTamneys have returned to Rotorua several times each year to expose their two girls to education the New Zealand way, their parents taking turns between countries.
Mark was doing the Japan stint when the 2011 Fukushima earthquake and tsunami struck. With communications obliterated he knew little of what had occurred, Sayaka and the girls were fully informed, flying straight back as Mark guessed they would, but meeting them was a chaotic nightmare.
"The usual three-hour drive to Narita airport turned into 13 hours of bedlam but the good news was the school escaped unscathed."
With it now so well established the McTamneys are staying on this side of the Pacific at least in the meantime, although they still keep tight tabs on their operation.
"We've very proud of what we've achieved in Japan. It's not only our livelihood it's what we've shaped, created and formed and want to continue doing."
MARK McTAMNEY
Born: Te Awamutu, 1971.
Education: Selwyn Primary, Edmund Rice - John Paul College, Waikato University.
Family: Parents: Jim and Gaye McTamney, wife Sayaka, daughters Ella (from previous relationship), Abby, 11, Alayna, 10.
Interests: Family, cricket, rugby (ex rep player), his Japanese school and connections it's created. "I'm still trying very hard to be bilingual", home hosting Japanese students visiting Rotorua.
Personal Philosophy: "Put yourself in the other person's shoes."