She says this is an important topic for the community to be aware of because death and grief are embedded in our lives and are always important to talk about.
"In these unprecedented times of Covid-19 when people all over the world are grieving, it is especially important to provide opportunities for people from all walks of life to come together to talk and share experiences relating to life-limiting illness, death and bereavement.
"Talking about death and listening to others brings us in touch with our shared humanity and mortality. It is how we can grow our compassion and care for one another in these times."
When asked why she encouraged people to come along, Kay said in her experience facilitating a Death Cafe in Auckland, she found that when people spoke together about their fears, experiences and beliefs, they not only inspired each other, but also experienced support, relief and peace of mind.
"They become aware of the diverse experiences people can have and are resourced to support those that are different from them.
"Acknowledging and talking about our experiences frees us to be present for others who are going through difficult times."
It also promotes our health, wellbeing and quality of life, she says.
"I remember one man who said he came to the Death Cafe as it was the only place he felt free to talk about death.
"His father had cancer but no one at home wanted to mention what might happen to him in the not too distant future. By coming to the group he gained confidence to assist his family to be present with what was happening."
Kay says there is no set agenda for the meetings, as what happens emerges from those who attend and the issues they bring. What happens in the group is confidential.
The group is facilitated by experienced facilitators and goes for one and a half hours. There is no cost involved. Participants pay for their own drink and refreshments.
Compassionate Communities is a movement which seeks to bring awareness to and increase community response to compassionate end-of-life care.
It recognises that caring for one another at times of crisis and loss is not simply the task of health and social services but is everyone's responsibility.
For more information on the Death Cafe movement, go to
- deathcafe.com
- facebook.com/deathcafe
- Twitter: @deathcafe
- facebook.com/compassionateCommunitiesRotoruaTe AtawhaiAroha.
