Raybon Kan, the man with an answer to everything

Kiwi comedian Raybon Kan will be in Rotorua to do a show at the Pheasant Plucker on Saturday. So The Daily Post put a few questions to him.

What makes you funny?

Funny is a team effort. The audience has a lot to do with it. Comedy is a relationship: a somewhat unhealthy, co-dependent relationship, where one person holds a microphone, does 100 per cent of the talking, and the audience listen, nod and agree, like a bizarrely submissive spouse from a previous century. It's like mild bondage, where the audience create the handcuffs in their mind, then forget where they imagined the key.

Why should Rotorua residents come to your show on Saturday?

If Rotorua residents don't come to the show, I will have travelled a long way for nothing. But guilt about my isolation and loneliness is not the only reason they should go to a show. Think of it as a health tonic. Laughter produces a lot of healthy chemicals in the brain, so my show is like a year's supply of full-body shaking vitamins. I dispense this drug orally, but it's up to the audience how they receive it. Through the ears works best, in my experience.

What's your favourite knock knock joke and why?

I don't do knock-knock jokes because I find strangers knocking at a door to be a gross invasion of privacy.

If you could meet anyone in the world, dead or alive, who would it be and what would you say to them?

Wow. This is a huge question. I'd like to meet Einstein, the night before he comes up with relativity - and get him so totally wasted, he doesn't actually think it up. It would be funny for humans to have an extra century of getting their physics wrong. No, that would be evil. I'd like to meet Jesus the day before he gets crucified, and persuade him that instead of going along with it, when the Romans come for Him, He should become Spiderman and write a whole new ending to the Bible.

What is the randomest thing someone has said to you?

The randomest thing anyone said to me was 3.1415926 ... it just kept going and was completely random. (Little Pi humour there for the maths nerds out there.)

What is the most awkward situation you have been in?

If I told you, I'd have to ask all the readers of The Daily Post to keep it a secret.

If you could own any pet what would it be and why?

My favourite animal is the polar bear. Such good-looking animals. I would love to own a polar bear who was also a great cook.

Other than yourself, who is your favourite comedian?

Easy. Right now my favourite comedian is Louis CK.

What is the hardest thing about being a comedian in New Zealand?

It's such a small country, it's possible every citizen has heard your jokes. You begin to hunt out recent arrivals at the airport, just for some fresh blood. Unfortunately, they often don't speak English.

What is your message to Rotorua residents ahead of the show?

One word: Eventfinder. Actually two more words: Pheasant Plucker.

To book tickets for the show visit www.eventfinder.co.nz