"It is quite a sensitive subject," she said. "It didn't really bother me if she was [arrested] or not. What's done is done and we can't change it. She's got no money.
"I feel sorry for her. We've just got to open our hearts and get on with it. She has mental health issues so she might finally be able to get the help she needs," Wesley said.
A video she posted on social media on Saturday has been viewed more than 120,000 times, with some viewers from as far as Denmark offering support.
Wesley estimated the cost of replacing each headstone was between $5000 and $10,000.
"We are looking at at least $100,000 all up (to replace the headstones)."
A Givealittle page set up in response has already reached more than $4000 and they have had offers from two monumental masons, one who assessed the damage yesterday and another who would charge only the cost of the materials.
"We've had donations from people I don't even know. It is absolutely overwhelming and amazing.
"One guy has gone up there to assess the damage free of charge which is absolutely amazing. It is not a short drive and he's gone up there to have a look around and let us know where we are actually at financially because we can't put a goal [if] we don't know."
Family members and the community spent Saturday trying to clean up the mess at the family plot and plans are in place for another working bee this weekend.
"I'm hoping to take the day off work and chip in. We'll take our shovels, paint brushes and paint and put it back how it should be."
A police spokesperson said the matter is ongoing, however, they acknowledge the distress caused to whanau and community members by the damage.
"We appreciate the support of the community in coming forward with information."
To donate, visit: https://givealittle.co.nz/cause/help-restore-and-rebuild-the-mana-of-the-waihape