Whaiora Patrick, 26, has severe postnatal depression yet maternal mental health authorities say she is not critical enough to qualify for funded care. Video / Andrew Warner
In Her Head is a Herald campaign for better women's health services. Health reporter Emma Russell investigates what's wrong with our current system and talks to wāhine who have been made to feel their serious illness is a figment of their imagination or "just part of being a woman".
Warning:This story talks about suicide and may be distressing for some readers.
A mum lived in fear of her husband coming home to find she had either harmed herself or left him and their children, because her postnatal depression had become too much to bear.
Despite having already harmed herself and thinking about taking her own life after giving birth, Whaiora Patrick, 26, waited six months for maternal mental health care as she was deemed "not critical enough" to qualify for funded support.
"Postnatal depression is like a dark blanket that covers over your life and you feel like you are being suffocated," Patrick told the Herald.
The Bay of Plenty mum shared her story with the hope it would encourage others to speak out in a bid to ensure women felt listened to and supported by the public health system.
Because since she was a teenager she's felt the opposite.
"I now make sure to see a female doctor because in my experience many male doctors haven't understood or listened, they'll say things like 'you're an attractive young lady, what reason do you have to be depressed'," Patrick said.
Looking back, Patrick said she first started experiencing postnatal depression after the birth of her daughter, Zahvina-Joe, now four.
"It was dismissed as baby blues and at the time I didn't know much about postnatal depression, so I didn't seek any further help," she said.
After the birth of her son, Blaize, now nine months old, her postnatal depression got worse.
"I had to wait three weeks just to see my GP even though I had self-harmed myself," Patrick said.
That was back in December 2020.
For months, both her midwife and GP made multiple referrals to the Bay of Plenty District Health Board for Government-funded maternal mental health services, but for six months she was deemed "not critical enough" to qualify for public support.
When asked why Patrick's referral was declined, Bay of Plenty DHB's mental health and addiction services business leader Jen Boryer said initially advice was sought on the referral from a psychiatrist, and information was communicated back to the GP in relation to management and further assessment.
"Whaiora was then referred back to the service and has had a maternal mental health clinician engaged with her since July 2021," Boryer said.
The DHB didn't respond to why it took months for Patrick to receive care.
Whaiora Patrick, 26, told the Herald she has already hurt herself after giving birth and is scared for her children's safety. Photo / Andrew Warner.
The impact her postnatal depression had on her relationship with her daughter and partner has been soul-destroying, she said.
"My partner wants to leave his job because he is so worried about coming home and finding I've hurt myself or taken off without the kids, but I've told him please don't leave the job you love because of me."
Patrick said she had a breakdown with her kids in the supermarket carpark recently and her partner knew she needed a break, so his family took their daughter for the weekend.
"When my daughter came back she remembered mummy crying in the car and she just looks at me and goes 'mummy, do you not want me anymore?'
"Hearing that was so heartbreaking and a wake-up call that I desperately needed help," Patrick said.
But, she said, even if women in her situation were screaming out for help it was so hard to be heard.
Whaiora Patrick feels she has been let down by the health system. Photo /Andrew Warner
There were health professionals who got it and who understood, but the system as a whole was broken.
"It's the whole ambulance at the bottom of the cliff, like are we meant to kill ourselves to be heard?"
Where to get help:
• Lifeline: 0800 543 354 (available 24/7) • Suicide Crisis Helpline: 0508 828 865 (0508 TAUTOKO) (available 24/7) • Youth services: (06) 3555 906 • Youthline: 0800 376 633 • Kidsline: 0800 543 754 (available 24/7) • Whatsup: 0800 942 8787 (1pm to 11pm) • Depression helpline: 0800 111 757 (available 24/7) • Rainbow Youth: (09) 376 4155 • Helpline: 1737 If it is an emergency and you feel like you or someone else is at risk, call 111.
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