WHANGANUI Olympian Les Wilson fully understands that the sum of the parts is far bigger than the individual.
But what he finds difficult to swallow is not being awarded a medal despite being a member of the New Zealand hockey team that won gold after an epic victory in the final over Australia at the 1976 Montreal Olympics.
Wilson and his fellow squad members were invited to Christchurch last weekend to help celebrate the launch of Suzanne McFadden's book Striking Gold, an account of the entire journey of the 1976 Olympic hockey team.
The book uncovers numerous practices dictating player entry to the highest level of international competition back in the day - 1976 was no different.
Wilson, like his teammates, had to pay $200 for the privilege of playing for New Zealand, buy his own gear and fund his own travel, while either taking leave or leave without pay from his day job as a boilermaker for the railways at Eastown workshops in Whanganui.
Wilson was not named in the team for the Olympic final, being the second-string goalkeeper behind No1 Trevor Manning, whose own story from Montreal is quite amazing.
Not playing in the final meant Wilson and teammate Neil McLeod were not awarded a gold medal after New Zealand's historic 1-0 win over Australia - that was hard to swallow. "At the time I was gutted and very nearly in tears, I just wanted to punch someone," Wilson recalled yesterday.
"And when we went to go out with the team to the medal ceremony we were stopped because we weren't getting one. That made me feel even worse.
"What was even more shocking was Neil getting picked out for random drug testing when he didn't even play in the final and didn't get a medal either - that was double standards."
During the book launch in Christchurch at the Transitional "Cardboard" Cathedral last weekend, the players were given commemorative coins from the 1976 Montreal Olympics.
"When we got back from Montreal in 1976, our coach, Ross Gillespie, had replica medals made up for us as a gesture," Wilson said. "Neil and I got one each as did team manager Tony Palmer and Ross - they didn't get gold medals at the time, either.
"The replica medal couldn't be exactly the same as the original, either, because of the trademark restrictions. I still feel a little cheated, but I have had 40 years to get over it now."
History has documented Manning's stunning performance in goal that helped win gold for New Zealand and Wilson accepted being left out of the team at the time.
With 10 minutes to play in the final, Manning was struck on the knee by a hard-hit Australian shot, cracking his kneecap. He played on in pain, staving off several more attacks until the final whistle.
"Trevor was No1 goalie. He had played in two Olympics while I had only limited international experience - it was a fair call to put him in. That was the culture; the team came before the individual, and that's as it should be.
"Suzanne's book is a great read and an accurate account, although there are many stories and anecdotes still to be told.
"It wasn't financially good for any of us to play at that level back then, but it was the same for all Kiwi athletes at that time. I couldn't even buy a present for my family on the way home. I wouldn't have missed it for the world, though, and it was so great to catch up with the team again at the book launch," Wilson said.