He says he hates interviews, but that can't possibly be because he doesn't like talking. Trust me, Kieran Keane, KK, head honcho of the Tasman Makos, former PE teacher, straight-faced veteran of the coach's box, loves a chat. Of course, in these parts, a chat is commonly referred to as a "bit of banter" and Kieran Keane definitely loves a bit of banter.
What he doesn't like, about interviews that is, is the fact that he's not in control of the questions. He loves asking questions - asks them of his players every day, tests them for weaknesses, interrogates them in search of holes in their understanding - but he's not a huge fan of having to answer them. Which is funny, because he gives a good answer. He's the interview equivalent of a Rubik's Cube; it takes a while to get him, but when you finally do it's very satisfying.
And Kieran Keane is quite satisfied too. His Tasman side have a chance to go top of the Premiership this weekend - a remarkable achievement considering they were only promoted to the top flight this year after a breakthrough Championship victory in 2013. I say quite satisfied because it is doubtful he's ever completely satisfied. He would have quit by now if he was, but after 35 years of coaching he's still going. Maybe he's only warming up.
He's got a reputation as a grump. I wonder if he's cultivated that image intentionally. "Yes," he says, before breaking into a smile. He smiles like a wise tortoise. "But I love my players - dearly, actually." Well, if he's not a grump, he's certainly to the point. "Well, you have to be straight up. It's cheaper and it's easier and you don't need such a long memory if you tell the truth."