"USA - You're F**ked" That's the opening line to an invitation from one popular Auckland nightspot for their American election results party on Wednesday.
No matter who wins the tightly contested presidential race the views of those throwing the Trump v Hillary party at Parnell eatery 46 & York are clear - "Murica is heading for disaster, so come . . . watch doomsday unfold."
The bar's Trump v Hillary event has live-streaming of election results and a "man on the ground" in America but also draws on election controversy serving burgers "coming out hotter than Trump's sex scandals".
Singer Boh Runga, agent to the stars Liz Delaney and author Justine Ross are among the well-heeled attending the 46 & York bash.
Dress ups of bad facial spray tans, toupees and Clintonesque pantsuits are encouraged - and "loud political views" are deemed mandatory.
Organiser Gemma Ross from Hustle & Bustle said it was hard not to poke fun at the "most bizarre, weirdly entertaining, but slightly terrifying election of our lifetime".
"With the result looking to be pretty dire either way, we thought it would be a good idea to get some friends and colleagues together and watch history unfold", she said.
In Auckland there is a smattering of other US election parties planned.
The Longroom in Ponsonby is welcoming Clinton and Trump supporters, Crabshack on Quay Street will have live coverage on big screens and Citibank has hired out The Culpeper.
Across town at The Classic Studio, Trump will take the stage at 8.30pm - well at least someone who looks and sounds a lot like him.
Comedian Alexander Sparrow kicks off his four night show "The President Tour" which is based around what would happen if "the unthinkable happened" and Trump came to power.
It covers all of the hot topics of the election "from immigration to global warming; from jobs, to how hot Trump's daughter is".
Meanwhile at the Fox Sports Bar at the viaduct there will be more serious faces and all fingers crossed for Democratic nominee Hillary Clinton.
The Democrats Abroad New Zealand is hosting the event as well as others in Wellington and Christchurch. All are hoping for a Clinton landslide.
"Even if those who support Democrats are not enthusiastic about Clinton they have to realise she brings decades of experience and level headedness to office," chairperson Kat Allikian said.
"Trump is a truly dangerous candidate."
Allikian said the battleground that has been the 2016 presidential race with accusations of sexual harassment and alleged deleted emails had been one of the "more interesting".
She said Democrats Abroad New Zealand had focused on getting as many Americans living in New Zealand to vote by ballot.
There are more than 30,000 Americans living in New Zealand and many more voters here studying and on holiday.
The American Embassy did not have exact numbers for those who had voted from New Zealand.
Rob Tate from the American Embassy in Wellington said the organisation would continue to accept ballots dropped off in person to the Wellington or Auckland offices.
Voting in New Zealand closes on Tuesday, November 8th.