A noticeable swing away from church-based funerals has been the catalyst behind two Wanganui men establishing a grief support service.
Funeral director James Forrest and theology student Mark Stephenson have been working together to set up the group, saying it is a service that many would find useful.
And they point out that grief does not start and end with death of a loved one. People grieve for any number of reasons, which could include failing health or job loss.
"We are finding that more funeral services are being held away from a church environment or don't have a religious theme, so those people don't have a church support network to call on," Mr Forrest said.
An estimated 80 percent of funerals are now held in funeral homes.
He said he was approached by a chaplain at a local rest home who said there was need for such a support service "but I'm not trained in that field. My work is as a funeral director.
"So while we have the facilities for a group such as this to meet here, we needed someone to co-ordinate it."
That will be the role of Mark Stephenson.
A former ambulance officer and mortuary technician, he has been studying extramurally for a Bachelor of Theology.
Both men said grief tended to linger a lot longer than people realised. Their support group would, hopefully, help these people make contacts with others in similar positions, so they could create a network they could relate to and call on when they felt the need.
"We almost always think of grief in times of death. But there are a lot of people who grieve when they lose a job or their health is suffering," Mr Stephenson said.
"In my experiences I've found grieving takes an indeterminate length of time to get through and people usually emerge from it as stronger human beings.
"But that process often comes a week or two after the death of a loved one, when friends and family have left you alone, and when the flowers, cards and phone calls stop coming as often as they did. That's the time when people need help.
"Both James and I have the same goal in mind: working with people who are hurting," he said.
Mr Forrest said he was unaware of a similar support group operating anywhere else.
"Some of the churches have their own bereavement teams but again that usually involves help for a member of their church," Mr Forrest said.
He said people were not obliged to attend their meetings regularly but whenever they felt the need for support.
Both men emphasised that their support group would be a first step for some and that if any sort of professional counselling was required, they would direct a person to that particular service.
The group will hold its first meeting at Dempsey and Forrest funeral directors in Guyton St, Monday, November 20, at 7pm. Meetings will be held every fortnight after that.
Grief support group planned
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