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Home / Northern Advocate

Carolyn Hansen: Learning how to love yourself is the first step

Carolyn Hansen
By Carolyn Hansen
Northern Advocate columnist·nzme·
14 Jul, 2023 05:00 PM4 mins to read

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Learn to meditate. It gets us in touch with our intuition, brings peace into our life and gives us a valuable tool we can count on when life gets tough emotionally and mentally. Photo / 123rf

Learn to meditate. It gets us in touch with our intuition, brings peace into our life and gives us a valuable tool we can count on when life gets tough emotionally and mentally. Photo / 123rf

OPINION

“If you talked to your friends the way you talk to your body, you’d have no friends left.”— Marcia Hutchinson

How do you view exercise? Why do you visit the gym? Is it an act of love or one of punishment? The way we view our reflection, our body image, plays a huge role in our perceptions. If we lack self-love when viewing our reflection in the mirror, this self-conscious lack of love colours everything we see and do, including our innermost feelings and perceptions about exercise.

A body image embraced and cradled in self-love, sees exercise as a medium, a path that honours healthy, vital living, gifting us with longevity of years. Seen in a positive light, exercise unveils the awesome capabilities of the human body.

A poor body image, one that is void of self-love, suffers from a lack of self-confidence and low self-esteem. This negative image breeds distorted perceptions that seep into the “whys” of “whats” of our lives, colouring them in a negative light. Sadly, when our body image is poor, our eating and fitness habits generally fall with it because we don’t feel good about ourselves. This negativity is contagious and begins dictating all facets of our lives. Not a good place to be.

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To most people with poor body image, exercise becomes a punishment of sorts — one used to mould us to society’s prevailing standards.

Self-love is a healing balm. Our level of happiness, health, career and relationships all rely on this empowering emotion. If we have not already, it’s time to develop, appreciate and honour our body for the incredible service it provides us. Not only will our relationship to exercise shift into a healthier version, but we will start viewing and approaching life guided, led and motivated by a positive light rather than a negative one.

There are many tools one can use to boost self-esteem, build self-confidence and experience authentic self-love.

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Here are just a few to get you started:

Begin by looking in the mirror. Eliminate any negative self-talk and look yourself straight in the eyes. Wrap your arms tightly around your body in a bear hug and repeat with conviction “I love you.” Most importantly, pay attention, listen to and absorb these empowering words!

Create love notes. Place positive, uplifting messages, around the home and even workplace. These become powerful reminders that help keep us in a positive, loving, frame of mind. Narrow down an area of your life that needs change. Write down a promise to yourself to focus and infuse it with self-love.

Live in gratitude. Before retiring at night and first thing upon waking, repeat personal, empowering, positive affirmations and mantras filled with gratitude. Beginning and ending the day this way works to change, on a deeper, subconscious level, the relationship we have with ourselves.

Slow your life down and learn to enjoy it. Eat more slowly, breathe more deeply, laugh louder and rest sounder. Learn to meditate. It gets us in touch with our intuition, brings peace into our life and gives us a valuable tool we can count on when life gets tough emotionally and mentally.

It’s about treating our body with respect. Hating it and judging it only attracts more of the same. If it’s positive change we are after, we must begin and end with love. Love heals, hate destroys.

It is love and gratitude that are empowered to change our lives for the better, not sitting in judgment of ourselves or others or hating our body. Love who you are, infuse this energy into every cell in your body and watch the magic happen.

Mantra. “I promise to honour and care for myself first, to love myself at all times, especially when I am not my best, and even if I must disappoint another.”

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Loving oneself is a chosen path, not a destination we reach. It is an ongoing service to self that builds a foundation supportive of our personal desires, goals and dreams in life and it continually thrives on self-nurturing.

Self-love is a magnet that automatically draws good things. Good fitness, good food, good people and good health are all neatly wrapped up in the simple act of self-love. When we view the world through self-love, we exercise because it feels great to our body, looks great on us and rewards us with healthy longevity, not because we’re married to creating an image that meets societal standards.

The level of success we experience in life, whether it be weight loss, fitness goals, career or family related, all begin and end with the empowering and powerful force of self-love, so don’t waste another minute. Create some empowering personal mantras to repeat daily and give yourself a big bear hug!

Carolyn Hansen is co-owner of Anytime Fitness

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