Northland's full Monty

"I've made you a proper Northland feed tonight," said Monty Knight, rubbing his hands together gleefully.
"We've got tuatuas and some scallops ..." At this point his phone rang, so I had no idea what else was on offer, but the seafood sounded good.
In the days leading up to my stay at Monty Knight's Okahu Estate vineyard, I'd been told to expect colourful language and some odd behaviour, but definitely fantastic food because, according to the locals, Monty has a fearsome reputation as a foodie.
But the wines were the stars as I stood at the cellar door, tasting an enormous range of Okahu wines with Monty's daughter Paula, winemaker Alan Collinson and Eric, the local pharmacist who'd dropped by on his way home from work.
Monty is one of Northland's founding fathers when it comes to wine production and, even if you've only a passing interest in the stuff, no trip would be complete without popping into Okahu.
With his impish grin and persuasive nature, he's the perfect host. Nothing is ever a problem and you soon feel at home after setting foot inside the cellar door.
It's comfy, rustic and welcoming - and the huge selection of wines to sample means you won't be going anywhere else in a hurry and it might pay to sort out a sober driver.
An entertaining raconteur and often controversial public speaker, Monty spends a lot of time travelling around New Zealand and overseas armed with bottles of his wine and a stream of stories.
He's also an obsessive frog collector. Not the slimy, croaky kind - the shiny, ornamental variety. He has cabinets heaving with them. "I get given frogs from people all over the world; people from other countries come and visit and before they leave there's another frog to add to the collection."
Like his amphibian friends, he's quite comfortable leaping into unknown waters.
When Monty first planted vines on his little block of land between Kaitaia and Ahipara back in 1984, he was told that fine wine just couldn't be done in the Far North. Yet he proved the critics wrong when, in 1996, Okahu's Kaz Shiraz 1994 won a gold medal and trophy for the "Other Reds" class at the 1996 Auckland Royal Easter Show.
Since then, Okahu Estate has gone on to become Northland's most awarded winery, winning stacks of accolades - not only for wines from their own land, but also with contract-grown fruit from Hawke's Bay, Gisborne, Te Kauwhata and other Northland vineyards.
And his vineyard is constantly evolving. "What I've discovered since growing grapes up here is that I've pulled more out than I'm growing now," said Monty, pouring me a hefty slug of syrah.
"I've learnt that this region seems to grow spicy reds really, really well, so the quality of varieties like this syrah, along with pinotage, malbec and chambourcin grown in Northland, can be exceptional.
"We got rid of cabernet and cabernet franc, and in its place we planted some really lovely different clones of syrah, which when they're blended give the wine some beautiful floral delicacy.
"Plus we've bought in some absolutely cracker chambourcin this year, the best I think we've ever harvested, so I can't wait to see how that matures."
He's also keen to test some new white varieties. "Just recently I've planted a whole lot of flora, which I think could be really fun."
Flora is an interesting grape that Monty likes because it's basically bulletproof. It doesn't rot and it produces plenty of fruit - "and I've got a few ideas about how I want to play with it", he added. "I want to create a spicy, slightly sweet and fruity white for the cellar door that'll be perfect for summer."
Monty thinks he might make a late-harvest version or even a nice sparkling style and, if he gets it right, it could just take off in the blossoming Asian markets, too.
"So it's a bit of an experiment for us, but it's not a huge risk because it grows so vigorously and easily - and hey, if it doesn't work out then we'll just pull it out and try something else."
It's that audacious, have-a-crack spirit that has enabled Monty's business to expand over the years, and his indefatigable passion for the region is infectious.
Clearly it's paying off, because as a tireless campaigner for Northland commerce and tourism, Monty was recently inducted into the Northland Hall of Fame for his contribution to Northland business.
Later that night, it was his contribution to Northland cuisine that won me over - starting with a heaped platter of freshly steamed shellfish, local cheeses and smoked seafood, followed by a delicious vegetable soup.
The pharmacist and Paula stayed for dinner and I can't quite remember what we had for the main event because Monty had me laughing so hard I couldn't concentrate.
Fuelled by more delicious wine, the conversation quickly degenerated from discussing the finer points of purging pipis to poo jokes.
"We try really hard to behave in front of visitors," shrugged Monty, "but sometimes it's just too hard."
Now for something completely different
June 10 marks the beginning of the National Asparagus Festival in the American state of Michigan and festival-goers are getting ready to mark the occasion by popping open bottles of asparagus wine.
It sounds horrendous, but that hasn't stopped Kellie Fox of the Fox Barn Market and Winery (one of 71 wineries in the region) giving it a go. Fox says it all started when her husband, Todd Fox, gave her a challenge.
"He brought home a tub of mashed asparagus and said, 'do something with this'. So I added water and sugar and yeast, and it started fermenting. I'll admit it did not smell great."
But people are buying it and if it takes off, Michigan could benefit. The state is the US's third-largest asparagus producer. And it's quick to make - "You can have something in the bottle in six months," Fox says.
Tasting sessions for her asparagus wine look set to be a key attraction at the Asparagus Festival. It'll be a brave person who ventures near the portaloos at that particular event.