Elder abuse can be close to home

Elder abuse can be financial.

Elder abuse is not just something that happens to people far away or in institutions. It happens to members of our community in the over-65 age group, to people who deserve to be respected, yet are harmed by people they know and trust. That is why the name ‘Elder Abuse’.

This week I spoke to Hanny Naus, professional educator, elder abuse and neglect protection, for Age Concern. I asked her what we should look out for with neighbours, friends, or family when it comes to elder abuse.

“Elder abuse happens in our very own community, in fact three-quarters of cases happen in our own family,” Naus said.

“It can start as something as simple as a family member helping grandma get her groceries and then over time they take control of her finances, and her card starts to be used for their own personal items by the family member.”

While a lot of people will think of elder abuse being physical, in most cases it is more mental abuse.

Abuse such as denying them the basics they are entitled to such as a warm, clean, and safe home, a warm bed and being fed.

What are the warning signs?

There are warning signs that we all must be aware of. Some are quite subtle but are often an indication of underlying problems happening.

Physically: Physical change, loss of weight, lack of concern for grooming/dress and overall appearance.

Economically: Bills not paid, insurances not being paid, home maintenance being forgotten, lawns not mown, rubbish piling up.

Demeanour: The person’s mood changes and they experience depression. They are not going out, not pulling up blinds and are generally isolating themselves.

Who do we contact

If you feel someone may be being bullied or neglected, don’t leave it. Contact Age Concern and talk it through. You can be anonymous and just seek advice, but if you suspect something, don’t feel you have to wait until you have proof. Trained staff know how to manage these situations and they have the contacts to put checks in place.

The rights of our older members of the community

Being vulnerable does not mean that you should be taken advantage of. Everyone needs to be accountable for their dealings with the older population whether a friend or family member. Choices for the older person should be paramount.

Why people don’t speak up about elder abuse happening to them

For some people, they do not know that elder abuse is actually happening to them and sometimes when they do, guilt and shame play a big part in them not speaking up. Especially if it is happening in their own family. They don’t want to rock the boat, so they don’t say anything to anyone.

Remember: Keep an eye on what is happening in your community and if you are concerned about anyone ... make that call.