Linda Hall: You're only as old as you feel

Photo / Thinkstock

There's a word I really don't like when it's used to describe older people ... cute.

I actually caught myself saying it one day when I was looking at a photo of an old couple.

Describing old people as cute, in my opinion, is demeaning and a little bit patronising.

Old people are a lot of things but cute they are not. Babies are cute, as are kittens and puppies.

I'm not saying older people are all ugly and horrible, far from it. But I would describe them with words such as friendly, lovely, kind and knowledgeable.

Sure, there are some grumpy, bad-tempered old people but there are grumpy, bad-tempered people of all ages.

And there's the question ... what age is old these days? The older you get, the older old age gets. I met an 86-year-old woman a few weeks ago dressed to the nines in low heels and she looked fabulous.

I guess part of it is how life treats you in your younger years and how you treat yourself.

Some people fly through life without a care in the world, others run into some kind of trouble at every turn.

And then there are the worriers. People who stress a lot tend to wear it on their faces and bodies in later life.

I read an article a few weeks ago about a woman who was 60. She said her greatest fear was to be involved in a car accident and be described as elderly in the newspaper.

It's funny how when you are little you want to be a big boy or girl, you boast about how old you are, proudly saying you'll be 5 soon.

I was at the park with a little person a while back and she wanted me to go through this tunnel with her. I said "I can't go in there". She said "Yes you can, you are a big girl now'. What could I say. I crawled through on my hand and knees hoping like hell the widest part of me - my behind - would pop out behind me.

We tend to wish our lives away when we are young.

Can't wait to be a teenager, can't wait to leave school, can't wait to start working and earning money.

Today's old is definitely a lot older than 50 years ago ... or am I kidding myself because I am getting older?

I'd love to hear what age you think old is and how you would describe old people. Email me on linda.hall@hbtoday.co.nz

I must say I'm not looking forward to being old. I think I'll call myself old when I'm 90. That way I'll probably only be old for a few years.

And by the way, if anyone comes up to me when I am 90 and says "Oh, you are cute", I shall thump them one with my walking stick and then run like hell.

I found this description on the internet:

Elderly means old when referring to a person.

If you mean at what age does a person become "elderly", then I don't think there is a precise definition.

You might mean a pensioner - but plenty of people of 60 or 65 are not "elderly" - they are vibrant and active.

Elderly normally refers to someone who is beginning to lose their faculties and needs more care and support.

• Linda Hall is assistant editor at Hawke's Bay Today